by Frank Klaune March 16, 2004
There's Frank. His doctor was some sort of drunken dumbass when he was born and now he has a frilly dilly.
by Frank Klaune January 02, 2005
by Frank Klaune January 22, 2005
Damn, Frank shagged some fat chick from the party. He almost got away with it, but his folks found her double barreled slingshot under the couch.
by Frank Klaune March 30, 2005
Humourous phrase relating to an exasperating incident. Shortly after 11 a.m. on a sultry August afternoon, Winky was riding in the back seat of the limosine as it cruised down the highway. He suggested to his driver, "It's almost noon. Find a place to stop for lunch." The driver drove on, eyeing the countryside with no rest area to be found. About 11:45, Winky said, "Okay now, find a roadside stop for lunch" and the driver continued to search as he drove on. Around 12:45, Winky now exasperatedly said, "Stop at the nearest stop. We WILL have lunch." The poor driver still didn't see a roadside stop, so when they drove through a small town, Winky excoriated his driver mercilessly saying, "I told you already to find a place to stop for lunch, damnit." The hapless driver shot back, "I've been looking and looking but honest... there hasn't been any rest areas!' At this, Winky angrily ordered the driver to pull into the little city square they were approaching. There, at theat unlikely location they all had a very late lunch. They then loaded the cooler back into the limosine and proceeded out of the little Nowheres-Ville in which they had their impromptu lunch. About a mile out of the town, they finally happened upon a roadside stop. After hours of hapless travelling without respite, the poor driver announced to Winky, "Hey, there's a roadside stop." Upon seeing the sign on the side of the road, Winky shot back, "OH SHIT AND SHOVE IT!"
Frank first had a check engine light. Then he got a brake light. Then an alternator light and an oli light. When the seat belt light went on, he got out, put a brick on the gas pedal, reached through the window and dropped the lever into "Drive". As the car squealed off the cliff, he yelled after it, "SHIT AND SHOVE IT".
by Frank Klaune April 18, 2005
An irritated or inflamed anal area. "The chappies" is a condition somewhat like hemorrhoids but on a more temporary basis. Chappies are usually caused by excessive ass wiping due to having the shits or by excessive moist farts causing a sore, irritated anal region.
"Damn, Frank's food was so greasy I had the shits all day. Now I've got the chappies so bad I can hardly sit down!"
by Frank Klaune March 06, 2004
Perhaps the most famous and most recognized Tomism (see "Tomism"), the term is used as a general insult. Tom K. would speak of another person as having "the I.Q. of a peanut butter sandwich". It is believed that Tom did not originate the phrase, however. In recent times, the phrase has been combined with "without the jelly" on the end- supposedly to indicate that a peanut butter sandwich WITH jelly has somehow a measurably higher I.Q. Go figure.
by Frank Klaune November 24, 2004