Flatster's definitions
Extremely thick smog, characterised by early black-and-white films set in between-the-war-and-just-after settings.
Cue: really bad cockney accent...
Cue: really bad cockney accent...
Cockney chap: Cor blimey, guv! I carn eevin see me face in this!
Cheeky chappy: Nah! S' a right pea souper n' no mistake!
Cheeky chappy: Nah! S' a right pea souper n' no mistake!
by Flatster November 18, 2005
Get the pea soupmug. Speedball was one of the greatest games on the Commodore Amiga computer (and ST but let's not talk about that POS - spit).
Written by the Bitmap Brothers and published in 1991, it combined elements of the film "Rollerball" and... a computer game. Extreme violence coupled with super-smooth graphics and crunching sound ensured a two-player contest between you and your best mate ended up in fisticuffs.
A sequel was written, Speedball 2, which captured all of the elements of the first game but introduced eight-way scrolling, extra ways to gain points and even more violence.
Luvverly.
Written by the Bitmap Brothers and published in 1991, it combined elements of the film "Rollerball" and... a computer game. Extreme violence coupled with super-smooth graphics and crunching sound ensured a two-player contest between you and your best mate ended up in fisticuffs.
A sequel was written, Speedball 2, which captured all of the elements of the first game but introduced eight-way scrolling, extra ways to gain points and even more violence.
Luvverly.
You: "Oi! Twat! Wanna game o' Speedball?"
Best Mate: "Ya! I'll fuckin' cream ya!"
You: "You reckon?"
5 minutes later
You: "Fuckin; cheat!"
Best Mate: "Bollocks! My joystick is better!"
You: "Mine got stuck! Cunt!"
Best Mate: "Ya! I'll fuckin' cream ya!"
You: "You reckon?"
5 minutes later
You: "Fuckin; cheat!"
Best Mate: "Bollocks! My joystick is better!"
You: "Mine got stuck! Cunt!"
by Flatster May 24, 2006
Get the speedballmug. The 21st century Gestapo. Will love you long time whilst going through your work to make sure everything is on the up-and-up but then will stab you in the back with an electrified letter-opener.
Scum of the office-world. The little prick who can hide behind company policy and get a hard-on when they find the dot above your "i" was 2 microns bigger than your company would like it to be
Scum of the office-world. The little prick who can hide behind company policy and get a hard-on when they find the dot above your "i" was 2 microns bigger than your company would like it to be
Auditor: "So pleased to be working with you! Could I see your ledger please?"
Worker: "No, fuck off you back stabbing, pedantic shit-stirrer. Come near me and I'll strangle you with your shoe laces".
Worker: "No, fuck off you back stabbing, pedantic shit-stirrer. Come near me and I'll strangle you with your shoe laces".
by flatster December 16, 2008
Get the auditormug. 1) An industry created from nothing that creates nothing.
2) Sarbanes Oxley is also a swear word.
3) Something to hide behind when you need introduce bureaucracy to the nth degree.
2) Sarbanes Oxley is also a swear word.
3) Something to hide behind when you need introduce bureaucracy to the nth degree.
SOX dweeb: Do have everything under control?
Office bloke: Yes
SOX dweeb: Can I see the documentary evidence?
Office bloke: We don't keep hard copy
SOX dweeb (smugly): The you have failed your control and I must report you to the highest possible echelon within the organisation who will inform of your failure and sack you. Sarbanes Oxley (SOx) is the alpha and the omega.
Office bloke: So fucking what? DIE!
/bang
SOX dweeb dies in a pool of it's own blood. Much rejoicing ensues.
Office bloke: Yes
SOX dweeb: Can I see the documentary evidence?
Office bloke: We don't keep hard copy
SOX dweeb (smugly): The you have failed your control and I must report you to the highest possible echelon within the organisation who will inform of your failure and sack you. Sarbanes Oxley (SOx) is the alpha and the omega.
Office bloke: So fucking what? DIE!
/bang
SOX dweeb dies in a pool of it's own blood. Much rejoicing ensues.
by flatster October 24, 2006
Get the sarbanes oxley (SOx)mug. The distance between the anus and the vagina.
Example: hold up your left hand and make a "C" shape with your thumb and index finger.
That's the distance you're looking for.
Example: hold up your left hand and make a "C" shape with your thumb and index finger.
That's the distance you're looking for.
A FACT: The distance between a fuck hole and a muck hole and if you miss yer inna shit 'n thassa FACT.
by flatster December 28, 2005
Get the factmug. by Flatster October 28, 2005
Get the dump stationmug. "Clangers" are two different things.
One is a 70's BBC children show where a family of Clangers lived on small moon with the soup dragon, the iron chicken and the froglets et al. When they spoke, they sounded like someone playing a swanee whistle. They ate blue string pudding.
The second definition is that one has made a mistake and "dropped a clanger". This is Cockney, not Mockney by the way.
One is a 70's BBC children show where a family of Clangers lived on small moon with the soup dragon, the iron chicken and the froglets et al. When they spoke, they sounded like someone playing a swanee whistle. They ate blue string pudding.
The second definition is that one has made a mistake and "dropped a clanger". This is Cockney, not Mockney by the way.
Example one:
Auntie Clanger: WoOowowowoOwOOOowoOOwooo wooo OOoo?
Baby Clanger: OoO.
Other Clangers: OOOOoooo.
Example two:
Bloke 1: Shit.
Bloke 2: What?
Bloke 1: Forgot the whife's birthday.
Bloke 2: Dropped a right fucking clanger there, mate.
Auntie Clanger: WoOowowowoOwOOOowoOOwooo wooo OOoo?
Baby Clanger: OoO.
Other Clangers: OOOOoooo.
Example two:
Bloke 1: Shit.
Bloke 2: What?
Bloke 1: Forgot the whife's birthday.
Bloke 2: Dropped a right fucking clanger there, mate.
by flatster January 19, 2008
Get the clangersmug.