The Battle Axe

A tough as GD nails kid who consistently overcomes every single obstacle in His way. Through the love and support of family and friends, you can try to slow him down, but good luck. Nasal cannulas, get F’d! O2 levels, bend over and He’ll show you what’s up! Rouge viruses, your mother’s a whore! Getting stronger every day, there is literally nothing that can slow Him down. Dominate enough that He should be feared by many, He is 1000% loved by all. He is truly an inspiration in every sense of the word.

Peach Daiquiri Dave: I heard The Battle Axe is teaching cowboys how to ride bulls.

Chef Kevin: No way, I heard he is teaching hockey players how to fight.

TT: Trust me when I tell you, you’re both wrong. He is teaching blacksmiths how to swing their f’n hammers.

by Falcon Thunder Fist December 16, 2023

Big Guy Energy

The overall vibe achieved when men whom have reached a certain age, weight, and comfort with their social status get together to not only tell stories from their glory days, but to also inspire each other to engage in other ill advised behavior simply for their collective entertainment.

Todd: I heard you’s guys telling stories on your podcast while I was driving up to the lake house.

Huff: Total Big Guy Energy on display, am I right?

Todd: Totally

by Falcon Thunder Fist May 12, 2021

Congrats on Your Gradulations

A message of over enthusiastic, usually alcohol fueled, well wishes when you are trying to over compensate with your Big Guy Energy, while doing your best to relate to someone much younger and more hip than yourself.

Drunk Golf Fan: Hey there fellow hip youngster! Hope you are having as much fun today as we are!

22yr old cashier: Not really.. This is just a side job because I graduate from college in the Fall.

Drunk Golf Fan: Oh wow! Well, uh, Congrats on Your Gradulations!

22yr old cashier: Yeah…. Thanks..

by Falcon Thunder Fist June 23, 2021

Danimal Cocktail

A delicious mix of Martell VS and Cranberry juice served over ice with the garnish of your choosing. A Classic Cocktail in every sense of the word and the signature drink of all hard partying fellas. Trust Me When I Tell You, this libation does not disappoint.

Huff: I hate every wine option that we have available here.

Kyle: I agree and to make matters worse, now they are out of Cream Ale.

Matt: What are we going to drink now?

Nail$: Barkeep! Pour us a round of Danimal Cocktails!

by Falcon Thunder Fist March 24, 2022

Turdballs

Black jeans, generally a size tighter than they should be, which announce to anyone in the vicinity of the wearer exactly the type of scumbag they should expect to be dealing with in the immediate future. These white trash denim slacks are perfect for any important trailer park event including, but not limited to, weddings, funerals, fresh back from a 4 year bid upstate welcome home parties, and of course, standing around a smoker for hours on end cooking a meal that could have been done in 15min on a grill. Always accessorize with a snake skin belt, cross trainer sneakers, and ideally a Vegas Jacket in order to look fresh to death while cruising on your bird scooter with your ride or die crew.

PD Dave: Hey man, are you ready to go yet?

Big Creepy: Just need to strap on my Turdballs and I will be ready to get beaver hunting!

by Falcon Thunder Fist November 02, 2022

Safety Shirt

Tight necked crew style t-shirt worn underneath another t-shirt. Uses include sopping up an excessive amount of sweat redirected from one’s armpits due to over use of medical grade deodorant, keeping one’s inappropriately stiff nipples from tearing through their outer shirt, or simplify adding a subtle splash of color to one’s ensemble. The Safety Shirt should be an essential staple of every Big Guy’s closet.

Mal: Do I see you wearing not one, but two t-shirts?

Marty: Of course! I don’t go anywhere without a Safety Shirt.

Mal: Is it because you afraid of sweating out all that Big Guy Energy?

Marty: Nope, I just want to make sure I’m not going around cutting glass when my turkey’s done.

by Falcon Thunder Fist July 14, 2021

Maintenance Cocktail

Spirits generally mixed with some sort of fruit juice and normally consumed in the late morning and/or early afternoon to help alleviate a particularly nasty hangover. Standard versions include Vodka/Cranberry, Screwdrivers, left over Hard Seltzers, and of course the Danimal. Also known as a Breakfast Cocktail when in Maui, a Maintenance Cocktail is essential for anyone who needs to rally and is eager to start working on the next day’s hangover.

Dave: Woof, I think we went a little overboard on the Peach Daiquiris last night..

Yoko: That’s why I stuck with white wine all night like a boss.

Dave: Good for you. I need to screw my head back on with a Maintenance Cocktail. Pass me the Gin and Tang.

by Falcon Thunder Fist March 24, 2022