Spirespotter

Describes someone who holds a cock/spire upright. The reason the word spotter is used is because, just like in benchpressing, the holding/spotting is done by a third party representative. Spirespotting is most common before the spicy bologna is inserted into the vagina (or rectum, for you cumtheca spirespotters out there) during intercourse. In pornography, the most common case of this is when, during a male-female-female scene, girl #1 is about to get her peach cobbler rived, so girl #2 grips the hedgehog and guides it into girl #1's pudendal crawlway.

The coati Ben Coates was robbing a liquor store when he felt something from below the waist. He recognized it as a hand. He thought to himself, "What kind of person would give my johnson such a firm skyward grip? Oh yeah, a spirespotter."

by Eric Kazinsky January 27, 2007

Connection Theory

Connection Theory is the idea that attractive young insecure women insult high-level men to lower them to her level and mask their own fear. In most cases, it is the only thing such a woman can do to connect with an intelligent man, whether in a positive or negative way, bringing him to a realm they understand and are experienced in. Such an action is a declaration that a woman feels intellectually inferior to a man and is insecure that a man will find her personality to be completely lacking.

Guy: I thought you had original opinions and views so I wanted to meet you in person, and see if the conversation is so amusing face-to-face as well and maybe get to know you afterwards.
Girl: I'm not interested, that's my excuse. Haha. Get over yourself. It's not an equation to solve. There is no formula, I just know and feel it, when it comes. And it didn't come with you buddy. Sorry. It's time for you to move on. Really.
Guy: Thank you for this high-level display of extreme insecurity and Connection Theory!

by Eric Kazinsky September 20, 2015

Law of Conservation of Mass

The Law of Conservation of Mass states that sluts will always change form into another form of slut. The slut content is conserved.

Guy 1: Everyone thinks Romana is a sweet little angel.

Guy 2: But I heard she likes to get her mouth girded by multiple men and dreams of gangbangs.
Guy 1: Wasn't she a monogamous good girl in the past into 'only' anal and bondage before?
Guy 2: Law of Conservation of Mass. Nothing to see here.

by Eric Kazinsky October 11, 2015

Reverse Catfishing

Pretending to be much uglier than you really are online.

Guy 1: So how was your date?
Guy 2: I had doubts about dating that girl because of her ugly photos online, but in person she was gorgeous and seductive. I was a victim of reverse catfishing. I am going to therapy now to deal with it.

by Eric Kazinsky July 03, 2017

Bidding Wars

A bidding war is a competition to be the highest bidder on an item. In real life interactions, a bidding war occurs all the time for women in the 18-26 age bracket, with endless amounts of love, attention, and money coming their way from hungry men. Ironically, these women are usually miserable, while any normal man experiencing that kind of bidding war on him for a couple of hours would be ecstatic.

Guy 1: Have you ever experienced the receiving end of Bidding Wars?
Guy 2: Once in my life. Four girls were fighting for me once in a bar. I felt like a complete king for about 2 minutes and 30 seconds. God I need a pussy.

by Eric Kazinsky January 13, 2016

Monsters Theory

Monsters Theory is the now-mainstream belief that very large breasts on young, lean women is the single most attractive look a woman can have, despite it having a relatively limited genetic basis (as studies of female siblings have shown) There is no established explanation for how women with 25-30% body fat and large breasts have their figures but luck seems to play the biggest role, since their looks and their breasts both are not an accurate reflection of their parents. The theory that attractive parents produce attractive children has become eroded due to monsters theory. Monsters theory states that genetics play some role, but far less than expected and otherwise ugly, fat parents with not particularly good genes can unleash bombshells on the world.

Example: Guy 1: Did you see that girl at the gym? Man, those were huge!
Guy 2: Monsters Theory in action. Let the monsters do the talkin.’
Guy 3: You scared bro?

by Eric Kazinsky November 03, 2015

Heat Check

A heat check is when you do something to check to see how hot you are. In basketball, this is done by taking a crazy shot to see if you are so hot, you can even make ridiculous shots. It is the most direct, non-subtle attempt to score with no strategy at all. In pursuing women, a heat check is a simple, direct statement made to a woman to see if she will be interested. A man is “just checking” to see if it works without needing more clever methods. The best heat checks involve minimal risk, because they are harmlessly “just checking” and not a full-blown attempt.

Guy 1: Why did you invite that girl to the bar with you so directly? Don’t you think it had zero chance of working?
Guy 2: Just a heat check. As long it doesn’t damage my chances at all with her in the future, it just checks to see if she might say yes to pure directness.

by Eric Kazinsky September 09, 2016