Definitions by Ereck Flowers

bars

Cell phone reception.

I have no bars. Oh, well.

bars by Ereck Flowers August 19, 2018

gumball coin 

A quarter.

I need to sort out these gumball coins.

gumball coin by Ereck Flowers August 18, 2018

potbelly

The protuberant body of a bong.

This smoke is gathering in the potbelly.

potbelly by Ereck Flowers August 18, 2018

crutch

Something that if a guy uses to get a girl, he's a douchebag.

Guy: My brother has had a hard time in life, so because I care about him, we should get together. Right?

Girl: Nope. Not on the same page. It seems you're using that as a crutch to get with me.

Guy: But I should get something for the pain I'm suffering, dammit!

(The girl slaps him and walks away.)

Guy: That was deserved. . .that was deserved.

crutch by Ereck Flowers August 18, 2018

unavailable 

The worst word to hear about a woman or man you like romantically.

Friend: She's unavailable.

Unrequited lover: Ah, shit. Gotta respect that. Ah, fuck, though.

unavailable by Ereck Flowers August 18, 2018

astroturfing 

A government ploy that is destroying American discourse.

So many company's astroturfing is hard to discern, so we must be that much more careful not to get fooled by it.

astroturfing by Ereck Flowers August 16, 2018

Midwest 

A place where if you use a three syllable word, they think you are a professor.

The Midwest and The South. . .no one knows which is dumber.

Midwest by Ereck Flowers August 15, 2018