1984 definitions by Eaton Holgoode
An old man's course, gray pubic hair. Typically found on the rims of public toilets and urinals as a result of natural hair loss during the aging process.
Frank called custodial services to report an excessive amount of Grampy's Whiskers in the office men's room.
by Eaton Holgoode September 30, 2015
A finger that is knobby, large knuckled and extremely rough from dry skin and callouses. Generally an old man's hands have one or more Grain Fingers.
Roger refused to continue to allow his older male neighbor finger his bum and perform a prostate milking when he paid the old man for head. The old man's dry, calloused fingers were becoming too rough and painful. The old man's Grain Finger was starting to feel like a someone shoving a granola bar up his ass.
by Eaton Holgoode May 18, 2015
Rachel took her bra off and wow!!! What a set of beef nubs. I had to suckle.
I sucked her beef nubs last night.
I sucked her beef nubs last night.
by Eaton Holgoode January 16, 2018
When you take one or more shots of whiskey to wash out the lingering taste and onset remorse of eating a bad smelling pussy.
Frank left the bar with the local whore. He was back about an hour lasting asking for a double shot for a whiskey wash.
I have had two whiskey washes braaaaahhh. I still can’t rid my palette of your mom.
I have had two whiskey washes braaaaahhh. I still can’t rid my palette of your mom.
by Eaton Holgoode November 16, 2017
When one experiences repetitive, explosive episodes of diarrhea with ones innards pumping out wet, watery feces with seemingly no end in site. The minute one thinks their are done the dump pump returns.
Roger won't be partying with us tonight. He's still hung over from last night and he's been a dump pump all day today. His pucker ring is tender to the touch.
by Eaton Holgoode November 11, 2015
A dump, defecation, shit or state of constipation that is so painful and so difficult to work out that one must grab the handicap bars within the stall in order to brace and provide leverage for the almost birth like pushing that is required to eventually reach the point of release.
Myron suffered from the worst case of constipation that he had ever encountered. This, combined with his severe external hemorrhoids created the perfect turd birthing storm and he went to the restroom and had a Bar Gripper until he finally released his demon turd.
by Eaton Holgoode January 27, 2015
by Eaton Holgoode May 8, 2018