Definitions by Eaton Holgoode

Tender Memories 

Spending an entire day, or several days, in personal reflection and thought to recall the actions that took place during a hard night of partying that rendered you waking up naked with a greased ass hole and a sphincter that's sore and tender to the touch.

After a big party at his frat house, Carl woke up the next morning with some seriously Tender Memories. He spent several days wondering what happened and was only reminded of his tender bung each time he took a shit.

Tender Memories by Eaton Holgoode April 24, 2015

Egg Plant Turd 

A violently and explosively released, compacted turd the size of an Egg Plant. Generally, large and bulbous at the initial release and tapered at the pinch.

Carl had been cramping all afternoon. He feared a massive shit. He finally went to the restroom and forced out the biggest Egg Plant Turd he has ever seen and felt. His bung was stretched but was relieved.

Egg Plant Turd by Eaton Holgoode April 24, 2015

Clotted Cream 

Thick semen that is ejaculated in significant quantity. Typically the cum of a very virile male in his teens and early 20s.

Howard longed for the day when his prostate power enabled him to shoot his load three feet in the air and his ball sack could serve up loads of clotted cream. Now in his 60s, he is happy just to wake up with occasional morning wood and to rub out a little dribble.

Clotted Cream by Eaton Holgoode April 24, 2015

Cleaning the Musty Basement 

To wipe and wash up one's Musty Basement aka dirty ass. May also apply to one's arse that has been given a cream pie.

After tapping his foot in the stall, Larry was joined by a brawny mate who pumped his arse full and left Larry Cleaning the Musty Basement when they were finished.

Cleaning the Musty Basement by Eaton Holgoode April 24, 2015

Speak and Leak

A situation occurrence at the most inopportune time while carrying on a normal conversation with friends and colleagues, making a presentation or publicly speaking. For one to speak and leak, one of the following must occur:

A. One passes loud, dry flatulence and is accompanied by repugnant smell.
B. One attempts to pass dry gas but passes wet gas and sharts and soils their pant's or dress and must make a the waddle to the restroom for a clean up.
C. One has had recent coital relations whereby a load of semen was deposited in one's ass or vagina and said love juice begins to leak out inadvertently leaving a wet stain or noticeable dripping from the under carriage.

As president of the company, Sandy gave her company outlook at the annual stock holders meeting. Her enthusiastic presentation came to an abrupt pause when she began to Speak and Leak. The semen from the Room Service Attendant she had lured to her hotel room for sex began to run down her leg.

Speak and Leak by Eaton Holgoode April 24, 2015

Dap Rag 

Piece of material used to wipe up post coitus love juices or post masturbation semen or wetness. Can be a sock, handkerchief, shirt, pant leg, wash cloth, towel, etc. Also referred to as a Gak Towel, Doddle Rag and Grandma's Tea Towel.

After Donald busted his nut all over Tonya's chin, she wiped up her chincicles with her panties she was using as a Dap Rag,

Dap Rag by Eaton Holgoode April 23, 2015

Sir Tugalot 

A reference to a male individual that is a well known chronic and habitual wanker. Constantly tugging and fapping to the point of obsession.

Carl: Hey Joe. What's with your roommate? Why does he always come in and go straight to his room?
Joe: Dude's Sir Tugalot. Won't see him all night.
Carl: Nice. What a wanker.

Sir Tugalot by Eaton Holgoode April 23, 2015