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Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Bare Handed Surgery

I walked in on my sister doing some bare handed surgery today. It was hot.

I can’t wait to get home tonight. I’m so horny and ready for some bare handed surgery.

My roommate was up for hours performing some loud bare handed surgery. I couldn’t sleep.
by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2019
mugGet the Bare Handed Surgerymug.

Alley Banging

Seeking and engaging in sexual activities with homeless men and or women.
I’ve got a rotten case of cheesedick after doing too much alley banging.
by Eaton Holgoode February 28, 2018
mugGet the Alley Bangingmug.

Asian Green Tea

When you pay an extra $25 dollars at the Asian Massage for her to piss on your chest while on the shower table and you find out, after the fact, she’s fresh with chlamydia.
I’m done with the parlor life braaaahhhh. One too many Asian green teas.
by Eaton Holgoode January 6, 2019
mugGet the Asian Green Teamug.

Gapped Up

Drilling her ass good and leaving her gapping and twitching. A sight to behold.
Go take a peek at Rachel. She's still on the bed all gapped up.

Impressive braaaahhhh!!!
by Eaton Holgoode April 7, 2017
mugGet the Gapped Upmug.

Stunt Linens

Stunt Linens are accoutrements to the boudoir of any sexually active male/female couple. For couples with a female that has not reached menopause, Stunt Linens consist of Stunt Sheets and Stunt Towels. For couples with a post-menopausal female, Stunt Linens consist of Stunt Towels.

The term “Stunt” comes from To Stunt meaning to engage in hot, sweaty, animalistic and frequent sexual activity.

Stunt Sheets are sheets deployed during sex play undertaken while a woman is menstruating and is commonly known as Red Sex. Stunt Sheets are placed on the bed prior to engaging in Red Sex and serve to absorb the mixture of liquids exchanged and discharged during coitus. These fluids include semen, blood and vaginal juices. Stunt Sheets should not be confused with Period Sheets. Stunt Sheets are apply to any Red Carpet Treatment and keep the bed tidy for the post coitemAfter Fuck.

The Stunt Towel is used during rounds of sex play when there is no Red Sex and Stunt Sheets are not required. The Stunt Towel protects the bedding from normal sexual fluid exchange. The Stunt Towel is laid out on the bed and coitus takes place on top of the towel keeping the bed dry of sexual juices and tidy for the post coitemAfter Fuck. The Stunt Towel offers the convenience of conversion to a Gak Towel, Doddle Rag or Grandma’s Tea Towel and can be utilized to provide a customary Butler’s Wipe.
Stunt Linens - Stunt Sheets - Sandy was experiencing a very heavy flow during her period. However, she was not about to let this top her desire To Stunt. Therefore, prior to her husband Carl getting home from work, she put on the Stunt Sheets. Carl later gave her the Red Carpet Treatment.

Stunt Linens - Stunt Towel - Sandy was exhausted from a long day of work, but was still ready for Carl to give her the Meat Drill when he got home. To ensure that she could go right to sleep after their post coitem enjoyment of the After Fuck, she laid out a Stunt Towel to keep the bed nice and dry.
by Eaton Holgoode April 16, 2014
mugGet the Stunt Linensmug.

Beef Lumps

Rachel loves to suck my beef lumps.

I love the sound of my beef lumps smacking her ass.
by Eaton Holgoode June 3, 2018
mugGet the Beef Lumpsmug.

Squirt N Jerk

The act of a male holding a massive load of diarrhea while masturbating sitting on the toilet. A master Squirt N Jerker will hold their diarrhea until the point of climax. At climax, both load are released for extreme gratification.
After holding a load of diarrhea for over an hour, he decided to take advantage of the opportunity to Squirt N Jerk and rubbed one out to a simultaneous explosion.
by Eaton Holgoode June 1, 2009
mugGet the Squirt N Jerkmug.

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