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Definitions by Eaton Holgoode

Squeeze Meat 

To Shit. Taking a big old shit. Ass blasting.
I’ll be right back. Gonna run squeeze meat.

I barely made it to the shitter to squeeze meat.

I had to leave the meeting I was in to run squeeze meat.
Squeeze Meat by Eaton Holgoode October 16, 2018

Gym Dribbles 

When you push the weights just a little too hard for that gain and soil a little skid dribble in your shorts. Protein shakes are a notorious source for gym dribbles.
Holy shite! I just blew gym dribbles with that last set. I need to run to the locker room and do a quick wipe.
Gym Dribbles by Eaton Holgoode October 16, 2018

Afternoon Musk 

The horrific musky smelling shit aroma that permeates office restrooms in the afternoon. It’s just not a complete workday until some workplace sap funkifies the place by pinching off a musky which is usually the result of some bad lunch choices.
This shitter reeks of afternoon musk.

The air in this crapper is ripe with afternoon musk.

I’d wait to go in there unless you want to inhale a thick, pungent afternoon musk.
Afternoon Musk by Eaton Holgoode October 16, 2018

Chili Dribs 

Streaks and stains and dribbles is stool in the gusset of a dude’s underwear from poor wiping or semi-loose stool and a little too much flatulence.
My wife said she’s done doing my laundry. Too many chili dribs.

Monday’s are rough after partying a weekend. I get the chili dribs at my desk.

My asshole was on fire this morning from the chili dribs.
Chili Dribs by Eaton Holgoode October 15, 2018

Plucking the old Banjo 

When she gets you off and you nut from her tugging on your banjo string aka the penile frenulum.
Rachel was plucking the old banjo last night while I was driving. I almost wrecked as I nutted though a res light.

I paid that whore $5 to get me off. She was plucking the old banjo so hard o think she tore it near the helmet. It’s killing me.

Making a Pot of Chili 

A euphemism referring to one cutting one’s bowels loose with the most vile, most heinous and most explosive liquified, stinging shit imaginable. Turning that clean bowl brown like a piping hot bowl of chili on a cold winter day.
Where’s your father? He making a pot of chili. Better get the air freshener.

I was pinching the whole way to the shitter before copped a squat and started making a pot of chili.

Bald Dog 

A bald, floppy, semi-flaccid penis. Usually the post nut, semi-chub.
She kept on wanking my bald dog after I blew nut.

I thought I was home alone but my mom walked in on me sporting a bald dog.

My uncle asked me if I had ever seen a bald dog.
Bald Dog by Eaton Holgoode October 15, 2018