Dr.FartScientist's definitions
A fart which is released from someone's bare, unclothed ass. As opposed to a filtered fart which passes through underwear and/or outer clothing, a raw fart is smellier and will expell fecal matter and bacteria onto any nearby surface.
Person 1: Hey, why is Todd so sick?
Person 2: I released a raw fart into his silverware drawer.
Person 1: Wow, that will be the gift that keeps on giving until he's done using all those forks, spoons, and knives!
Person 2: I released a raw fart into his silverware drawer.
Person 1: Wow, that will be the gift that keeps on giving until he's done using all those forks, spoons, and knives!
by Dr.FartScientist June 7, 2017
Get the raw fartmug. To remove a toxic person from your life by performing one final sweet act of kindness for the poor demented soul who has no hope before permanently cutting ties with them so they can't continue to destroy your life.
Guy 1: I don't know what to do about my son, he won't stop using drugs, he constantly steals my money, he crashed his car 5 times, has been picked up for DUI once a week for the past year but the cops feel too bad for him to even arrest him for it, and he jerked off into my favorite baseball cap.
Guy 2: Take your son out for ice cream and a prostitute, drive him far away in your car while reminiscing about "the good times", then when you get to your destination, Lenny that mother fucker!
Guy 2: Take your son out for ice cream and a prostitute, drive him far away in your car while reminiscing about "the good times", then when you get to your destination, Lenny that mother fucker!
by Dr.FartScientist June 22, 2017
Get the Lenny that mother fuckermug. When you are sitting in a hot ass porto-potty that is baking in the scorching hot sun and the sweat off your back is running down your ass crack, your ass full of sweat turns your toilet paper wad into a wet wipe when you go to wipe your ass.
Q: Arthur, is your bunghole feeling fresh after that deuce you just dropped?
A: Why yes, Theresa, yes indeed. It was so damn hot in that fucking portable toilet that I was gifted with sweat wipes to freshen my ass! Now may I please receive that BJ you offered me this morning for raking the leaves?
A: Why yes, Theresa, yes indeed. It was so damn hot in that fucking portable toilet that I was gifted with sweat wipes to freshen my ass! Now may I please receive that BJ you offered me this morning for raking the leaves?
by Dr.FartScientist June 13, 2017
Get the sweat wipesmug. I want to take this stink bitch out on a date; however my only ride is this cajun food meahicle! If I bring my tablet and hulu, it'll be dinner and a fuckin movie!
by Dr.FartScientist June 8, 2017
Get the meahiclemug. Much like the unhealthy chain restaurant, a McDonald's Relationship is a quick and ready seni-romantic relationship between two consenting adults. Like the "food" from the aforementioned cheap food dispensary, this type of relationship is toxic and the psuedo love experienced leaves your system as fast as your body disposes of a Big Mac from your bowels. The emotions experienced are as nutritious as that dang Mcflurry you like to choke down!
Jay: Yo, this chick I met in Target like gave me her number and I like called her and applied pressure for her to let me hit dat and she like came over and hit me in the eye with her dick. I then realized she was actually a dude.
Jermayne: Jay, my man,you got to stop havin' dose friggin' McDonald's relationship wit dees hoes, and git dose fuckin' Mickey D fries out ya mouf when you be talkin' to me!
Jay: I think I'm a gonna marry him... at least when my black eye goes away.
Jermayne: I am SMHing my head at you right now dawg.
Jermayne: Jay, my man,you got to stop havin' dose friggin' McDonald's relationship wit dees hoes, and git dose fuckin' Mickey D fries out ya mouf when you be talkin' to me!
Jay: I think I'm a gonna marry him... at least when my black eye goes away.
Jermayne: I am SMHing my head at you right now dawg.
by Dr.FartScientist October 6, 2020
Get the McDonald's Relationshipmug. When you get to a red light that takes forever to change green forcing you to make a right turn then a u-turn to avoid it. The maneuver was created by a balding, middle-aged man frustrated with living in the Ternberry gated community in an unknown city and state. It has been said that nobody gave a shit about Ternberry, not even the assholes who programmed the traffic light to exit the community and make a left turn.
The maneuver is performed in the following method:
1. Stop at light and wait 5 minutes.
2. Realize you're an idiot for waiting.
3. Turn right out of frustration.
4. Frantically cut across all lanes of travel to the left turn lane.
5. Shuffle the steering wheel all the way to the left.
6. Bust that u-turn like a boss, cutting off some old dumb bitch.
7. Continue about your business.
A successful Turnberry Shuffle is achieved if the asshole stop light doesn't turn red on you after your u-turn defeating your efforts as if the traffic light knew and decided to punish you.
The maneuver is performed in the following method:
1. Stop at light and wait 5 minutes.
2. Realize you're an idiot for waiting.
3. Turn right out of frustration.
4. Frantically cut across all lanes of travel to the left turn lane.
5. Shuffle the steering wheel all the way to the left.
6. Bust that u-turn like a boss, cutting off some old dumb bitch.
7. Continue about your business.
A successful Turnberry Shuffle is achieved if the asshole stop light doesn't turn red on you after your u-turn defeating your efforts as if the traffic light knew and decided to punish you.
For fucks' sake Sarah, perform the Turnberry Shuffle at this light, it will take for fucking ever for it to change for us!
by Dr.FartScientist December 11, 2018
Get the Turnberry Shufflemug. The Fart Injection Threshold (FIT) is the exact pressure necessary for a person's "hiney" which is properly and securely mated with a cloth surface (couch, car seat, pillow, etc.) to break through the somewhat permeable fabric with flatulence. If one cheek of said hiney is higher than the other or your pelvis is tilted, the fart will fail to penetrate the fabric barrier and thus pass through the choad channel and dust the back of your testies.
1. Last week I had to put plastic on my couch because some bad children broke into my house and fumigated my furniture. Good thing scientists have yet to discover how to break the Fart Injection Threshold of 3,000 Mil plastic.
2. Yo, my girlfriend has such a sexy butt, I used to always sniff her car seat. That was until her pops told me that he frequently breaks the Fart Injection Threshold of her car seat when he borrows her car to get Indian food!
2. Yo, my girlfriend has such a sexy butt, I used to always sniff her car seat. That was until her pops told me that he frequently breaks the Fart Injection Threshold of her car seat when he borrows her car to get Indian food!
by Dr.FartScientist May 4, 2017
Get the fart injection thresholdmug.