Ballsamic Glaze

That ripe, pungent, vinegary glaze of sweat that accumulates on the balls and surrounding crevices after failure to bathe for days during the hot summer months.
I didn’t realize how bad of a ballsamic glaze I had going on after not showering for a week. I gave the old balls a little scratch and tug and stirred up a ripe aroma of stank that was more than overpowering.
by Dick Onchin July 07, 2020
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Engorger

An extremely rigid and turgid penis that has been stimulated in a penis pump for 20-30 minutes.
I pumped for 20 minutes before the old lady got home from work so I could rail her from behind with an engorger.

I was still sporting an engorger for about another hour.

My engorger was a deep shade of purple and the head had the appearance of a purple potato.
by Dick Onchin September 20, 2020
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Sloppy Slapping

A reference to sex sounds. Usually the getting railed variety.
I couldn’t sleep with the camp counselor railing the new kid in the upper bunch. The sloppy slapping was just too much.

I walked in the house and could hear some sloppy slapping going on in the shower.
by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020
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Florida Sweetbreads

Floating human shit found in a natural body of water like a lake, river or ocean that was intentionally released from someone’s bowels.
I hung my ass over the pier and dropped some Florida sweetbreads.

We were swimming in the river and we dropped some Florida sweetbreads to keep the gators fed.

I was boogie boarding and pretty sure I surfed past some Florida sweetbreads.

We were boating all day and I dropped a few Florida sweetbreads through the day off the side.
by Dick Onchin October 18, 2020
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Himalayan Butt Plug

Himalayan Butt Plug

Shoving an ice cube up one’s own or their partner’s ass.

He was hitting me from behind last night and took my breath away when he surprised me with a Himalayan butt plug.

Can you get frost nite from a Himalayan butt plug? Asking for a friend.
by Dick Onchin October 22, 2020
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Fresh Favorite

Receiving a vigorous hand job, while in a car, parked in the lot behind the local Kroger.
I was raging wood so the old lady pulled off and gave me a fresh favorite.

The new bag boy gave me a fresh favorite on break.

My lunch break today consisted of a deli platter and a fresh favorite.
by Dick Onchin March 07, 2022
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Panty Custard

The amalgam of semen and vaginal secretions leaked after coitus into the gusset of a female’s panties.
I have got to do a load of wash. I have no panties so I’m going commando until I get these cleaned of all the panty custard.

I hooked up with a tinder date last night that lived two hours a way. It was a long drive home and I could feel the panty custard leaking the whole way home.
by Dick Onchin December 15, 2020
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