Definitions by Dick Onchin

Gopher Dot 

When a male or female squats over a sleeping partner’s forehead and commences to start gopher holing repeatedly until the juicy turd is extended out far enough to leave a small shit stamp on their partner’s forehead.

Only a true gopher holing master can accomplish this time treasured feat of intestinal strength.

There will be no gopher dot tonight. I had Taco Bell earlier. Too loose.

I woke up this morning and the random I hooked up with had left with no goodbye but I shortly saw in the mirror that he had said goodbye with a gopher dot.

Gopher Dot by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020

Cripple Cream Flogger 

Performing a vigorous hand job on a wheelchair bound male until he busts a nut load of man cream.

I can’t tell you how many cripple cream floggers I gave Randy during his two months of recovery. That wheelchair had to get the bolts retightened from all the shaking.

The home health nurse was like 65 years old but she never left without a cripple cream flogger.

Cripple Cream Flogger by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020

Butter Badge 

An extremely moist asshole. May be caused by sweat, other bodily fluids, swamp ass, a shart, a poor wipe job or general uncleanliness.

I need to go Re-wipe. I got a butter badge.

I got her so wet it dribbled down her taint and made a tasty little butter badge.

Tommy broholed me last night and I ended up with a butter badge.

I tried to squeeze on off in class but I ended up with a shart. I had to sit there till class was out with a butter badge.

Butter Badge by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020

Cincinnati Bootstrap 

The small area of skin between the vagina or penis/ball sack and the anus that is particularly dirty and smelly because of a failed back to front wipe job. In other words, a taint with some shit on it.

Also known as taint, grundle or gooch.

I was railing my neighbor’s wife from behind when I began getting some wafts of dirty ass. I looked down to her Cincinnati bootstrap needed a bit of a wash.

I wiped my ass the wrong way cause I was in a hurry and gave myself a Cincinnati boot strap.

The homeless dude was washing his Cincinnati bootstrap in the Park fountain.

Cincinnati Bootstrap by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020

Brewed Nuggets 

A poor ass sap of a male that gets his nuts handed to him every time he turns around from an overwhelming bitch of a spouse.

Here comes brewed nuggets. Poor guy can’t even go get a beer with us without his old lady bitching.

I was a brewed nuggets for about 6 months till I finally dumped her ass.

Brewed Nuggets by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020

Grab Bars 

Obese, meaty rolls of fat hanging below the hip line and mid-section.

Her jeans were painted on and that only added to the size of her grab bars.

I was railing that skank from behind so I latched ahold of her grab bars and went to pound town.

Grab Bars by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020

Filet My Stuff 

Euphemism for sex. Getting absolutely railed. Dicked down.

He came over last night and had me face down, ass up. He really knows how to filet my stuff.

She told me to come over and filet my stuff. So I’m out brooohhhh.

I told him to filet my stuff and now my twat looks like a punched lasagna.

Filet My Stuff by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020