Favrestock

Favrestock is a several month long period of intense media speculation, conjecture, indecisiveness, and hubbub circling around Brett Favre.

It is customary during Favrestock that Brett Favre hint at the possibility of ending his retirement and subsequently return to National Football League. Once this initial statement has been made, the excitement and dread of Favrestock commences.

Favrestock's humble beginnings date back to March 4, 2008 when Brett Favre shocked the world when he openly proclaimed his retirement after 16 illustrious seasons in Green Bay. Favre's retirement was short lived when he decided to make a return to NFL that resulted in a messy divorce with the Green Bay Packers.

Favre's resulting statement of a triumphant return sent the NFL world into a frenzy. Thus, Favrestock was born.
Pandering ESPN reporter: Today on SportsCenter Brett Favre meets with team physicans. Chris Mortensen dishes the facts on the next chapter of the Favre Saga.

NFL fan: Dude! Brett Favre is un-retiring... AGAIN! I hope he'll go back to playing with the Jets!

Another NFL fan: Please! Favre is a fossil, he needs to take his rightful spot in the pasture. Don't get so caught up in this freaking Favrestock.

NFL fan: We'll at least we went to the playoffs... Sheesh, the guy is a proven winner.

Another NFL fan: That's what everyone thinks... Favrestock is back once again!
by Define Me! August 18, 2009
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applectomy

A medical condition in which prolonged usage of Apple technology results in degenerative brain diseases. Applectomy is subsequently branched into a wide variety of symptomatic illnesses based on the level and type of exposure to Apple products.

Decreased Motor Cortex Stimulation: Prolonged usage of Apple's touch screen technology will result in the degeneration of the motor cortex. Resulting in a loss of fine motor skills and overall finger dexterity needed to finely manipulate items. Items such as a keyboard.

Appsosis: A debilitating mental illness brought about by chronic exposure to the Apple iPhone's third party applications causes dementia and neurosis among patients overly engrossed into their recently purchased "app".

I-Form Dyslexia: A learning disability that stems from habitual usage of Apple's "i" products i.e "iPod", "iPhone", "iMovie". Patients begin to refer to objects with the prefix lowercase "i". Referring to a pet dog as "iDog" or a friend as an "iFriend" is a sign of I-Form Dyslexia
Jim: Hey Sarah how are you doing today?

Sarah: *In profound vegetative state*

Jim: Sarah please stop using your iPhone, Please! Your family needs you...

Sarah: *In profound vegetative state*

Doctor: I'm sorry Jim but she's suffering from late stage applectomy. Her brain has atrophied from prolonged use of her iPhone.

Jim: God no....
by Define Me! March 21, 2009
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brotal recall

An unruly mutated batch of bro's seeking to start the "Natty Reactor".
Doug: Remember that time at Mars' house we all got fucked up drinking when we started the Natty Reactor?

Richter: Hells yeah! I had soo much of that shit! Then Lori came over; she gives me a huge Kuato in my pants! I had to tap that!

Doug: Dude! It was complete Brotal Recall!!!
by Define Me! January 15, 2010
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bronie madoff

The Wall Street, suit and tie bro who has an entry level position at a mid level brokerage firm. Gladly offers his services to his upwardly brobile broskies. Often pitches woo to soft headed women about his brobility to make 100 grand in a week. Know for completely crediting himself as helping the head honchos at his brokerage firm brorchestrate a brostile takeover of Goldman Sachs.
Le'Bro James: Sweet! GE just went up by 5 points today, along with Procter & Gamble. I gotta thank Bronie Madoff for getting me into stock markets. I'm making mad paper!

Bro Diddley: Hell yes!
by Define Me! October 24, 2009
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Grim Reaper's June

Used to describe the the month of June 2009 in which 5 fixtures of American popular culture passed away. In chronological order, David Carradine, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, and Billy Mays.

In such saddening progression, Grim Reaper's June has dealt a shocking blow to millions of Americans. These individuals bestowed upon generations of Americans laughter, love, and products not seen in stores. Their extraordinary talents and abilities represent the innate creativity and ingenuity of humanity. From bubbling locks of flaxen blond hair, to shifty dance numbers that magnetized entire generations of humans these individuals will be truly missed.
Steve: Oh God! Who's next? First, it was Carradine.... and now Billy Mays! Who's gonna sell me those little knick knacks you see on infomercials late at night?

Lloyd: I'm still reeling from Michael Jackson's passing. Is this some sort of Grim Reaper's June??? I've been watching CNN for 72 hours straight!

Steve: I don't know man, but these series of saddening events makes you celebrate and honor what these people have done for the world. It sort of puts your life in perspective....

Lloyd: Uhh... Is it too soon for a dead person joke?

Steve: TOO SOON!
by Define Me! June 29, 2009
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Totalitarian Media Zealots

An umbrella term describing a growing number of intrusive celebrity gossip blogs,and entertainment news websites. An abbreviated form of term i.e "TMZ" serves as the title for the popular entertainment news site TMZ.com.

A totalitarian media zealot can be easily described as a faux journalist employed to "find the scoop", "breaking the story", "dig up the dirt", and "spread rumors" on high profile individuals in the entertainment industry.

The credibility and ethics of totalitarian media zealots is perpetually in question as they become even more intrusive, libelous, and blantantly shirk the rights to privacy of our favorite television, music, and movie stars.

Totalitarian media zealots are commonly known to amass large standing armies of paparazzi. Not to be confused with a "press photographer", paarazzi are ruthless paid mercenaries of totalitarian media zealots. TMZ paparazzi is dispatched to any location where a known celebrity is spotted and usually it is not a red carpet event. Personal privacy is habitually disregarded by a totalitarian media zealot paparazzo for the sake of achieving an impromptu photo or video of the celebrity.

Totalitarian media zealots are proving to be menace to American society as the demand for quick and easy access to celebrity "infotainment", "gossip", and "rumors" increases exponentially. The spread of zealous media totalitarianism is currently undermining the integrity of journalism as the unethical tactics utilized by TMZ are being adopted by reputable press outlets.
Known totalitarian media zealots:

www.perezhilton.com

www.tmz.com

tabloid magazines

The New York Post

www.eonline.com

Ryan Seacrest

cable news networks
by Define Me! March 21, 2009
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family guy drinking game

The Family Guy Drinking Game involves two or more contestants. The contestants watch an entire season DVD of Family Guy episodes.

The object of the game is to imbibe an alcoholic beverage every time a non-sequitur or flashback is made throughout an episode.

The goal of the Family Guy Drinking Challenge is to maintain mental lucidity. After successfully watching an entire season DVD of Family Guy, the contestant who is unblurred and clearheaded is declared the winner.

If the entire contestant group is largely sober after successfully completing the game. Then the game proceeds to another round. Another season DVD is played and the game restarts.
Jeff: GOD! It's Friday night and I have nuthin to do as usual!

Ryan: Jeez calm down bro, I found a drinkin game for us.

Jeff: Like what....Quarters?

Ryan: Nah it's the Family Guy Drinking Game.

Jeff: How do ya play it?

Ryan: Real easy bro, just watch a DVD of Family Guy and drink every time the characters make those "This reminds me of that one time...." flashback jokes.

Jeff: Duuude! That's like a 100 times per episode... Were gonna get trashed!

Ryan: Let's call Seth!
by Define Me! July 27, 2009
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