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Definitions by David B Weingarten

Asparajiz 

Foul smelling male ejaculation resulting from the comsumption of asparagus prior to arousal.
She could wash away the smell of burning rubber after he asparajized on her face during sex.
Asparajiz by David B Weingarten September 25, 2011

Hyphen Siphon 

Fellatio performed on a small penis.
When asked about giving a hyphen siphon to the Asian guy, she said it was like drinking wasabi through a straw.
Hyphen Siphon by David B Weingarten September 25, 2011

Spank Planking 

The act of discretely masturbating while planking.
His facial expressions made it look like he was spank planking on top of the bench.
Spank Planking by David B Weingarten September 24, 2011

Trojan Buffalo 

The act of ripping a dollar bill instead of opening a condom, while hovering over the night stand before sex. Intended to fool a female into thinking you'll be wearing protection during intercourse.
"She's usually pretty responsible, but she fell for the Trojan Buffalo, and now she's 6 months pregnant."
Trojan Buffalo by David B Weingarten September 24, 2011
Fake yawning, intended to determine if a member of the opposite sex is checking you out.
"I'm gonna fawn real quick before I go talk to her. If she starts yawning, I know she's been looking at me and wants to be harrassed."

"Dude, please stop trying to fawn. You just looking like a middle-aged stroke victim with paranoia."
Fawn by David B Weingarten September 11, 2011

Top-sighted 

The inability to see a woman's bottom half while intoxicated.
"When I sobered up and the top-sightedness wore off, I realized that her physique looked like an upside down maraca."

"All I saw was a pretty face and a nice rack. I had no idea her body actually looked like my bong."
Top-sighted by David B Weingarten September 11, 2011