cigarette

1. A magic wand used to conjure buses. You can stand there for an hour waiting for your bus to come, but as soon as you light up a fag, it will come round the corner, forcing you to put it out.

2. Something that non-smokers frequently manage to die of cancer without ever using.

3. Something for self-righteous but somewhat timid morons to declaim and campaign against without having to feel like they're going out on a limb.

4. A drug that makes you violent and cuts your IQ in half, damages your liver, frequently causes death on the roads and in homes, destroys careers, lives and families, and costs our country millions every year in lost productivity from people who are too sick to come in to work after using too much of it the night before. Oh no wait, that's beer.
Let's see, what shall I spend my time campaigning against? Racism? No... how about religious fundamentalism? Maybe pollution or censorship... Ah, no, I've got it! Cigarettes!
by Dave June 20, 2004
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RAK

ahr-ay-kay

Random Act of Kindness.

Just an unexpected, and completely random, act of a good deed, hence kindness.
"I figured I'd pay for his meal. You know, just an RAK."
"RAK?"
"Random Act of Kindness."
"Riiiiight..."
by Dave July 07, 2004
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OIF

"OIF is by far the US's most challenging war, on ALL aspects, including particularly politics."
-me
by Dave September 13, 2004
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you shut up

A quick response from a person being told to shut up.
POSEUR : "Yo yo yo yo you suck motherfucker!"
ME : "What?"
POSEUR : "Why do you wear army clothes anyway are you a faggot?"
ME : "Shut up!"
POSEUR : "You shut up!"
by Dave January 06, 2005
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ferneye

when smoke ascends from a cigarette into ones eye making it red and sore
hahaha he's got ferneye!
by Dave April 01, 2003
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Poofman

one whose goal is to imitate the "Beefcake"
He is such a freaking Poofman, sporting around in his Lightning
by Dave May 13, 2003
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fiction

"There's too much fiction in real-life these days. Many things which people say are real are actually fiction. Political scandals are now fiction these days, because it's been such an ultra-hot topic for so long that everyone has exaggerated it. When people exaggerate reality, it becomes fiction."
-me
by Dave November 30, 2004
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