DJ Jaybee's definitions

flatpack-palm

A painful condition - sometimes lasting many days - that often appears halfway through the attempted assembly of flatpack furniture. It can be avoided with the use of an electric screwdriver.

When I made my son's new bed - by the time I'd got 15 screws in, I had flatpack palm - it wrecked !

by DJ Jaybee September 9, 2004

Creaser

1: An unfortunate clip of the testicles, usually at a tangent - which sometimes feels more painful than a full impact.

2: Something that is really funny

1: When I caught my nads on the corner of the desk it was a real creaser.

2: The receptionist wet herself when you sent that funny email - it was a real creaser.

by DJ Jaybee August 26, 2004

wonk

Masturbation that goes sadly wrong or is attempted with a semi-erection.

She was a bit rough - it ended up with her trying to wonk me off.

My mum caught me having a wonk.

by DJ Jaybee August 26, 2004

wrecked

Something that is extremely painful.

The hammer splatted my thumbnail and it wrecked!

by DJ Jaybee September 9, 2004

cunt stick

1: Tool used by male to interface with the female pleasure palace

2: Tool used by female and inserted into her nu-nu to generate joy juice.

1: I did her behind the bins with my enormous cunt stick

2: Her cunt stick came out with a 'pop'.

by DJ Jaybee August 26, 2004

rikking

Something that has been cranked up - usually above the normally acceptable level or something that provides an ample amount of pleasure.

The P.A. system was vibrating my bollocks and sounded rikkin'.

My curry was well tasty, as the chef knows how to get it rikking with all the spices.

by DJ Jaybee August 30, 2005

Phagwah

Something that is idiotic or boring - or both.

Something that is drab or lifeless.

A hindu festival where a special drink called 'thandai' or bhang (Cannabis sativa) is also consumed sometimes, which actually contains small amounts of marijuana to make the festival more enjoyable.

The lad on the bus dropped his keks which was well Phagwah.

Waiting for the bus was Phagwah.

She isn't any good at design, whatever she comes up with will be Phagwah.

by DJ Jaybee August 30, 2005