Definitions by CrunchyCookie
Costco
Waitaminute, you guys make us buy 10 gallons of Vaseline, pocket $20 in profit every time, then make us fork over $50 for the privilege? Damn Costco, you a bitch.
Costco by CrunchyCookie December 1, 2011
Hyperbole
Hyperbole by CrunchyCookie November 30, 2010
book smart
book smart by CrunchyCookie November 25, 2010
Digg
A once-magnificently entertaining website whose heart, soul, and brain simultaneously died on August 25, 2010.
Goodbye oldtime Digg wit, humor, variety, democracy, interesting stories, and thoughtful commentary... hello boredom, ghost towns, corporate content takeover, and recycled Reddit leftovers.
Digg by CrunchyCookie November 15, 2010
Jimmy Fallon
A guy who saved NBC Late Night's sorry ass twice in one decade. First time was in 2000 by resurrecting Weekend Update (with much help from Tina Fey), turning it into a fun and clever guy-girl exchange that worked wonders. Second time was in 2009 after the whole Leno-Conan reshuffling clusterfuck didn't work out, leaving Fallon as NBC's only non-fail comedian (out of four) still standing.
Writes jokes that are smart, relevant, and actually funny (unlike Leno). Also unlike Leno, his comedy sketches actually reflect some effort and creativity (i.e. Remix the Clips) instead of being tired ripoffs or just mooching off user input for humor. If there were justice in the world, Fallon would host the Tonight Show and Leno would get bumped to 4:03 AM on Telemundo.
A pretty good impressionist and parody songwriter, too.
Writes jokes that are smart, relevant, and actually funny (unlike Leno). Also unlike Leno, his comedy sketches actually reflect some effort and creativity (i.e. Remix the Clips) instead of being tired ripoffs or just mooching off user input for humor. If there were justice in the world, Fallon would host the Tonight Show and Leno would get bumped to 4:03 AM on Telemundo.
A pretty good impressionist and parody songwriter, too.
Conan at his peak was still the best, but as replacements go, you gotta admit this Jimmy Fallon motherfucker is aiiiiiiite
Jimmy Fallon by CrunchyCookie November 15, 2010
Glee
1. The most craptastic show on FOX since Family Guy. Featuring fake and contrived drama, paper thin characters, and writing so witless and godawful it causes brain shrinkage. Supposedly about being high school outcasts, but explores the issue with the most dumbed down and irrelevant examples possible (umm getting splashed with Slurpees??). Preaches diversity, then proceeds to cast the ugliest minorities they could find and rarely lets them sing or speak. Storylines are lame and every joke misses by a mile. Glee's one saving grace is its music, especially the mesmerizing and heavenly voice of Lea Michele. Too bad this usually ends up being 8 minutes of treasure buried under 52 minutes of rhinocerous turd.
2. A way to make millions of dollars off the works of other artists and songwriters.
2. A way to make millions of dollars off the works of other artists and songwriters.
Glee by CrunchyCookie October 11, 2010
Kyoto
Kyoto by CrunchyCookie October 18, 2008