Carnefice's definitions

Dick Duelling

The act of yourself and an opponent perfectly aligning your penises and urinate as hard as you can, so that the two jets hit eachother. The winner of the duel is whomever lasts the longest, or manages to defeat their opponent by pushing their stream back.

“Enough of this, let’s settle this like real men! Through Dick Duelling!

by Carnefice November 5, 2017

Vatican Syndrome

When a non-religious person visits a place of great Christian significance (such as The Vatican), and is so enchanted by the art and scenery that they consider becoming a born-again Christian.

“Seeing all of the statues, all of the artwork, I just feel like this place is *right*, you know?”

“Sounds like classic Vatican Syndrome to me.”

by Carnefice November 14, 2021

COFFEE song

‘COFFEE’ is an acronym representing the phrase “Chorus Only, Fucking Forget Everything Else”, used to describe songs that have no tangible substance or meaning beyond a catchy chorus.

“Have you listened to ‘Unholy’ by Sam Smith?”

“Are you kidding? That’s a total COFFEE song.”

by Carnefice April 25, 2023

Type 2 Fun

The name given to the feeling of enjoyment and nostalgia when reflecting on an event that was a negative experience at the time, but is humorous or fun to look back on.

"God, I hated hiking up that mountain at the time. But looking back, I guess it was a unique experience. That's Type 2 Fun for you!"

by Carnefice January 2, 2018

Midnight Blues

A feeling of intense sadness and shame for the past or the dreading of events to come, stemming from overthinking as a result of sleep deprivation. This often occurs late at night, but can usually be remedied by simply sleeping.

“Babe I’ve been crying again, I miss you so much!”

“Just get some rest. You’ve got the midnight blues.”

by Carnefice July 24, 2019

Endor Brake Manoeuvre

To brake abruptly as the target of a high speed chase, as to force your pursuers to vastly overshoot you, ram one another, or collide with an oncoming object.

The phrase “Endor Brake” comes from a popular example of the manoeuvre’s use, in Star Wars Episode VI, Return of the Jedi.

“How did you escape the FBI so easily?”

“It was simple, I gave them the old Endor Brake Manoeuvre!”

by Carnefice December 23, 2017

Devil’s Appetite

To habitually and often uncontrollably chew one’s own flesh, to eat oneself, often out of anxiety or boredom.

Common appendages on the body that are subjected to the effects of Devil’s Appetite are the sides of one’s knuckles, callouses on the soles of feet and toes, and the palms of one’s hands.

“Michael, why is there blood smudged on your paper?”

“Sorry, I have Devil’s Appetite and sometimes I take it a little too far.”

by Carnefice June 18, 2019