Definitions by Captain Duder

Spread the Web 

Early morning need for a man to stretch and pull on his nut sack. This sometimes result in a moist/warm nut sack looking like a web being spread apart...hence Spread the Web

Early each morning, Bill felt the need to spread the web before he got his cup of coffee.

Spread the Web by Captain Duder April 19, 2012

dwollop 

To finger an orifice on one's person. Distinct from "fingering" or "to finger" which can include mutual fingering. Dwollopping is fingering oneself absent of another person.

In Asia, the process includes some sort of animal fat residue as lubrication.

Betty likes to dwollop herself after picking up burrito's from the restaurant where the guy shot that chick.

dwollop by Captain Duder February 26, 2011

UAD 

Acronym for Uncontrollable Appetite Disorder. A disorder associated with very large people.

Mr. Allen has a UAD, we really should respect his disorder.

UAD by Captain Duder July 9, 2009

meater baddeater 

A racehorse designated by an owner who has a majority stake in a meat production and/or meat processing company.

Announcer "Around the bend, Meater Baddeater heads toward the finish..."

meater baddeater by Captain Duder April 30, 2009

Cream Cheese Baby 

The substance left 24 hours after a female ingests the "Day-After" pill.

So my GF took this pill to take care of that accident the other night. It was nasty, but she is still hot so its cool! She cried and called it her cream cheese baby.

Cream Cheese Baby by Captain Duder March 23, 2009

Infert

A fart inside you. Most people confuse this with gas or indigestion. It is actually you farting inside yourself.

Sean - "What was that noise"

Andrew - "Sorry man, I inferted"

Sean - "Infert?"

Andrew - "Yeah...look is up on Urban Dictionary."

Infert by Captain Duder February 6, 2009

TMI 

Stand for "Totally Masturbatable Information" thereby turning your embarassing moment into a much satisfying one.

Sam "Hey Joe, I think I have some feces on the back of ma pants."

Joe "TMI, man"

Sam "You sick fuck...wanna eat it off my rock hard bubble butt"

TMI by Captain Duder January 16, 2009