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Braveheart's thirst for blood's definitions

mode of failure

1. When talking about machines, the way it dies/becomes permanently unusable/gets bricked/gets broken.
2. Refers to the method by which anything/anyone with a fixed life span meets their doom.
1. An overclocked CPU's mode of failure is usually overheating.
1. If the blown engine's mode of failure is a cracked connecting rod, you should modify the connecting rod to make it stronger.
2. Instead of being stabbed with a spear, a common mode of failure for Presidents of the US who die in office is being shot with a firearm.
2. "In the 1st Millennium, a common mode of failure for Popes was martyrdom."
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aol disk

Time-Warner's way to make sure Linux never gets on to too many PCs. You see, if AOL is installed on more computers, users would be forced to use the dial-up modem (tyranny by costliness) which runs only on Windows.
Back in the old days, an aol disk was a floppy disk, which meant they could be reformatted and reused. But now they are a CD-ROM, which wastes plastic for crappy software, software which prohibits you from starting any executable code (even beneficial code) on your computer for the first 5 minutes after you sign on.
by Braveheart's thirst for blood January 22, 2007
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pseudo-random

Describing a sequence of numbers generated by a deterministic computer that is seemingly random, but eventually repeats. Good pseudo-random number generators have very long periods before the sequence repeats.
The date Easter falls on is pseudo-random in that it cannot be predicted off the top of someone's head, and it takes 5.7 million years for the sequence to repeat.

To generate a pseudo-random number in C, you'd use the Rand(); function.
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whopper patch

A transdermal patch in a Burger King commercial that enables the wearer to resist the craving for a Whopper.
Narrator:It's been many hours of staring for these people in the staring contest. Now we bring in the Whopper to see who wins.
::places Whopper in between the two people staring at each other::
::Person 1 looks away and eats the whopper::
::Person 2 rolls up his sleeve to show the Whopper Patch::
Person 1:"Whopper patch!!?? That's not fair!!"
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no talent whatsoever

Any "music" (actually non-music)artist that has recorded a song from any time since the start of Clinton's first term and still counting. Also called a Zero-hit wonder.
Most of today's rap and goth-metal artists have no talent whatsoever.
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mana

1. A measure of magical energy, the kind used in role-playing games. Also called Wiccan Action.
2. Electrical energy (not power), usually found in a house coming out of a wall, or in a battery. The amount of energy in one mana depends on what role-playing game the person who is using the word is playing.
1. "You only have 4 mana, which is 1 mana short to make Bombur lose 1 pound of dwarven body fat."
1. "It would take 9 mana to resurrect Mordred."
2. Person A:"Do I need to bring extra camcorder batteries?"
Person B:"No, just bring the adapter, they've got mana at the show."
2. "Central air conditioning uses a lot of mana in 98.6 deg F weather when all the windows in the house are open."
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witches test

In engineering, any destructive test which results in the system under test being destroyed even if the system passes the test. Usually done more for the entertainment value of destruction instead of achieving any scientific end. Refers to the Renaissance-era test in which a (supposed) witch was thrown into a large body of water--if she drowns, she's not a witch..if she floats, she's a witch and was killed by another method. Both results of the test result in death.
Me:"Don't send your antique radio to Ignautius, he only does witches tests."
My friend:"What does he do?"
Me:"If a fuse blows he replaces it with a higher amperage fuse until something else blows."
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