release the kitties

Famous last words you don’t want to hear, because it means you are about to be killed by a horde of ruthless, predatory kitties. Made famous by Metalpocalypse.

When Bottom said, “Release the kitties,” I knew my death would be slow, painful, and certain.

by Bottom Ford, Esq February 27, 2012

paragaffe

The social offense of wasting people’s time by blathering on for a whole paragraph when a short sentence would suffice.

“All I wanted to know was whether Bottom is still smoking. He wrote back a whole paragaffe about why it’s none of my business and smoking is not a problem for him.”

by Bottom Ford, Esq May 16, 2011

fire drill

A method for getting no-longer-wanted company up off your couch and out the door.

“Come on, Bottom, fire drill!”
“Wait, I’m not done telling you about the cool dream I had during my nap.”
“The house is on fire, Bottom! Go, go, go!”

by Bottom Ford, Esq March 21, 2014

scat signing

A series of gestures that look as if they should be meaningful but are actually complete nonsense.

“Bottom dances pretty cool, but what’s he doing with his hands?”
“He can’t sing, so must resort to scat signing.”

by Bottom Ford, Esq December 17, 2010