antisong

A song by a skilled musician trying to make a bad song. The result is a song so bad that it must be genius.

Not to be confused with camp (accidentally bad; ironically good) or parody (a mockery of a good song).

The Rick Roll song is camp.

“Amish Paradise” is a parody song.

“Old Town Road” is an antisong (because only a genius could have made it).

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover July 16, 2019

diddly squat

diddly squat ain’t but nuthin’ at all

I had DIDDLY SQUAT to do with selling all that gay pornography to those terrorists!

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover August 19, 2019

ordering Chinese

When you make a delivery order for Chinese food and then you tell your man to fuck you. So he does, in the ass, on the living-room coffee table. Just as he’s balls-deep, the Uber Eats guy knocks on the door.

But it swings wide open (as if you left it ajar on purpose). Now he’s 7-feet away from you just staring. Slowly, he steps forward and asks with a real sexy voice:

Somebody order THIS DICK?!

Ordering Chinese later if you want some!

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover April 08, 2019

The Constitution

A magical document that always agrees with you.

You can't charge $14 for movie popcorn because the Constitution says so!

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover May 25, 2018

zoned-out

when you’re thinking about something, and it makes you forget to talk.

Mouth open, he zoned-out to think about bonobos as his bitch of a wife continued to whine about the croutons at the salad bar at the restaurant that SHE chose on YOUR birthday.

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover July 15, 2019

on the take

Getting paid for one’s role in fraud or corruption.

The entire state of Louisiana is on the take.

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover April 14, 2019