BillieJeanIsNotMyLover's definitions

diddly squat

diddly squat ain’t but nuthin’ at all

I had DIDDLY SQUAT to do with selling all that gay pornography to those terrorists!

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover August 19, 2019

zoned-out

when you’re thinking about something, and it makes you forget to talk.

Mouth open, he zoned-out to think about bonobos as his bitch of a wife continued to whine about the croutons at the salad bar at the restaurant that SHE chose on YOUR birthday.

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover July 15, 2019

social construct

A rhetorical technique used (often by a neurotic undergraduate a with a Yoko Ono tattoo) to deny the existence of irrefutable fact. But this is not its original meaning:

Properly understood, a social construct is a thing that emerges as a result of social interaction. For instance, the price of gold is a social construct—it emerges from the market for gold as an approximation of how society presently values gold in relation to another asset, usually currency.

Social constructs are no less "real" than the price of gold is "real." It's not as real as gold itself, but it's pretty damn real.

Mondays are a social construct.

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover July 14, 2019

Texas Hold ‘Em

The superior form of poker: each player is dealt 2 cards, face down. A round of betting ensues. Then 3 cards are dealt in the middle of the table, face up. Bet. Another card in the middle. Bet. Again. Bet. Your hand is not required to include the initial facedown cards and standard poker rules apply.

If a winner fails to shout “yee-haw” before grabbing her chips, she mist shout 5 “the starts at night are big and bright,” each followed by 5 short claps of the hands and a joyous “DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS!”

Anyone who forgets the Alamo must be shot.

Let’s play Texas Hold ‘Em

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover July 16, 2019

Zonked

(Adjective) Usually caused by drug use, it’s when you’re not sleepwalking but not fully awake either. You’re awake, but you’re acting as if you had no agency and things only happen to you. But also you’re not like a zombie.

You’re just ZONKED

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover March 23, 2019

on the take

Getting paid for one’s role in fraud or corruption.

The entire state of Louisiana is on the take.

by BillieJeanIsNotMyLover April 14, 2019