Jesus 's definitions

Free Ipods

Great example of false advertising. Instead of paying direct cash for an overpriced mp3 player, you succumb to the soul craving corporate conglomerates by signing up for any number of "offers." A successfull offer earns credit towards a free ipod. These "offers" tend to be premium (read: costly) coupon saving subscriptions and/or skin cream demos. The only hitch is trying to cancel a subscription to said offer. After completing the offer, all you have to do is force 5 people to do the same.

I got this free ipod by ordering 5 gallons of face cream. Want a coupon?

by jesus March 18, 2005

lmgalway

1.) A woman who is extremely dull, boring, and lacks redeemable qualities.

"That girl, what a fucking lmgalway. She needs to get her ugly face out of that Vampire Lestat book and get a makeover."

by Jesus April 28, 2003

hazlett

Very obnoxious and never knows when to quit.

Damn it Hazlett, stop trying to stick your dick in my vagina!!!

by Jesus June 4, 2003

ksil

Another word for god.

ksil is our almighty god.

by Jesus July 8, 2004

Congress

An overpaid circle jerk that can raise its own pay. Nowhere else would it take 100 people to fuck something up.

Congress is like the Special Olympics after a lobotomy.

by Jesus January 17, 2003

legitimate

born in wedlock

my children are legitimate, i was married when they were born.

by jesus November 16, 2003

pooner

n. Someone who is better than others at some sort of activity.

Man that guy is a pooner, he destroyed their whole team!

by JESUS April 14, 2005