John's definitions

turtle dick

1. An uncircumsised dick. As in the way it looks b/c of the foreskin, like a turtle that is in its shell.
2. the first words my friend said when he saw my uncircumsised dick.

person 1: dude, im not circumsised...
person 2: ohhh, you have a turtle dick huh?

by john November 19, 2004

liver lips

lips belonging to a 3 footed moose who violently chews the noses off of it's victims. Yeah. very scary.

As Jessy walked through the crowd with her liver lips, many innocent people lost their noses.

by john May 2, 2003

Pumpkin Beast

When someone has a horrible fake tan that makes them look very orange.

Ugh, did you see Tammy's new tan? What a pumpkin beast!

by John May 13, 2005

lickmyear

virtually licking a dogs penis, while calling a really hot man called tom

damn i called u last night but u were probably just lickmyear-ing

by john February 24, 2005

fridgecat

A girl that is too ugly to sleep with unless you're so drunk that you cannot perform anyway.

I went home with a fridgecat last night, so now I've got blue-balls and a hangover.

by John June 18, 2006

bachelor party

A party a man's friends throw for him before he gets married. There is often heavy drinking and/or strippers (i.e. all the things that he won't be able to enjoy once he's married.)

Two weeks after Tom and Becky's engagement, Tom's friends blindfolded him, threw him in the back of their car, and took him to Layla's Tongue Shop in downtown Harlem. Then next morning, still hungover, he thanked them for a great bachelor party.

by John July 9, 2007

Pachuka

A thin stick like instrument used to clean resin/tar out of the cone piece of a bong.

Man, you got a pachuka? This billy is blocked...

by John May 13, 2005