A rare species of mammal that lives exclusively on community
college campuses. It is roughly seven
feet tall, with a large hump in its back. This bipedal hominid has
long, scraggly facial hair, which usually has bits of sandwich in it (from whence it's common name is derived; its scientific name is Sandwichus beardicus).
Several species of bird nest in its unkempt facial hair, and it cares for this colony tenderly, so that it can feast upon them at a later date. This "farming" method
may denote some semblance of intelligence, though its mental capacities are dubious, as the creature seems to have invested over ten thousand dollars of its own
money in a bad mermaid movie.
The
Sandwich-
beard uncurled from the foliage of the community
college parking lot, emerging into the sun, and attempting (in vain) to find a mate.