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A dressed and split chicken for roasting or broiling on a spit
(If you're jerking off with a spatula you need serious psychological help)
by Sean February 26, 2004
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The act of a (flexible) person with both breasts and a penis giving themselves a titwank.
Did you see that video of that hot shemale spatchcocking?!
by iPhil November 22, 2011
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the act of using one's penis to flip eggs off a partner's vagina
She asked me to make her breakfast, so I offered her a spatchcock.
by SledgeTheHammer October 02, 2006
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slap your cock so hard the spatch cocked almost pass out with pain
"anyway last night i spatch cocked her and then i had to take her to the hospital...she had 10 stitches"
by Omega Nova May 05, 2006
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A serail drunark who continuously gets smashed, hits on women well above his league, tries anxiously to phone his on/off girlfriend and repeatedly crashes out due to exuberant use of a glass of beer. Welcome to the world of the spatch-cock.
1 beer: Marc says "hows life guys?"
2 beers: Marc says "fuck off ya bawbag"
3 beers: Marc says "Your a chamsie shatner"
4 beers: Marc says " They all want it, every last one of them!"
several beers later: After picking 3 fights with his own pals, Marc decides to wander aimlessly through the night club, hiccupping on his journey, trying to find the nicest girl to get slapped from. "Marc, you alright?"
"Im fine ya cunt"
"gie that burd peace, shes not interested!"
"they all want me, hiccup"
"Marc, were going hame, come on"
"aye wait up, I hate yous, I hate yous aw"
"Aye, very good Marc, ya spatch-cock"
by Rupert Shucks March 09, 2004
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