To masturbate so aggressively that you cause harm.
by ADignorantium November 30, 2019
When a wife covers her own ass by claiming her husband's incompetence or unwillingness resulted in failure or error when the actual root cause was her own inability or unwillingness to communicate clearly or effectively.
"My wife blamed the Thanksgiving turkey on my bad back."
"Dude, that's spatchcocking. You got spatchcocked."
"Dude, that's spatchcocking. You got spatchcocked."
by Celestin November 28, 2015
A venereal disease, which can be contracted from chickens. Causes inflammation of the genitals, uncontrollable clucking and pale, spheroid stools. Latin name: avius coitus.
"Hey Dave, why are you scratching your crotch?" "I got thoroughly pissed on a farm last week, and woke up in a chicken coop with a serious case of spatchcock."
by Potassium Procrastinate November 1, 2017
When a guy is going down on you but you have nothing but two bottles of wine in your stomach, so you just vom all over his face.
"Emily, you just spatchcocked me on Thanksgiving. Now I have to get the wine out of our fake tree." -- Blake
"Just leave it for the dog. I don't even have a his anymore." -- Emily
"Just leave it for the dog. I don't even have a his anymore." -- Emily
by cm2342 November 28, 2020
by napping bunny March 23, 2022