Pasteurbation 

noun

1.The act of using pasteurized milk as lubricant while pleasuring oneself.

2. The act of spilling milk on a laptop whilst looking at porn, consequently voiding any warranty under which the PC might be.

3. The acting of rubbing one out to grazing cattle.

After receiving blue balls from his girlfriend, Jon resorted to pasteurbation when he realized he ran out of lotion.

After speaking with a Geek about repairing her computer, Peggy became irate once she was told her PC's warranty was void. After further inquiry, she discovered that milk spillage was not covered. She later realized that her son, Byron, was into some heavy, habitual pasteurbation.

Pasteurbation by BulldogNelly June 20, 2012

casteurization 

The act of castration by means of boiling the testicles and scrotum of a male in boiling hot water.

This one time, my friend got a hooker. He loved this hooker, but she wasnt the freshest daisy in the garden. We thought he might have a disease so we thought he should pasteurize his balls, he did, long argument short, they dont work anymore; means of casteurization. Sorry Mr. & Mrs. Stevens, you can still encourage adoption if you want to be grandparents.

casteurization by Matt Towle February 7, 2008