gabh mo leithscéal

Pronounced "gaw - maw - leshkale". Irish phrase meaning "excuse me". Common everyday phrase in Ireland, used most often perhaps by old men who, when "surprised" by a fart they just emitted, offer this as a kind of peacemaking gesture. His thinking - "maybe they won't walk away in disgust if I excuse myself in Irish. At least that way they'll know I'm not a Black and Tan". The phrase may also be used by babies who have thrown up all over the kitchen table, as they know saying this will mean the father won't think his wife had an affair with a Black and Tan, and the mother won't think her husband slept with a prostitute on his "business trip" in Taiwan. Why this in any way proves that I don't know. But anyone who says gabh mo leathscéil deserves your respect, nay, downright fucking admiration. You Black and Tan cunt.

Also, a polite expression often used after the killing of a Black and Tan and his family, to excuse the action.

Old man: *prrrrrrrrbbbffffffttttt* (fart) "OOOOHHHHH, gabh mo leithscéal."
Bystander: "I salute you, Irish hero" *prrrbbbfffttt* "OOOOHHHHHH, gaw maw leshkale."
Old man: HE SPELT IT WRONG!!! YOU SPELT IT WRONG YOU BLACK AND TAN CUNT I'LL KILL YOU!!!!"

Baby: *pukes all over kitchen table* "OOOOOHHH, gabh mo leithscéal."
Father: "I TOLD YOU!!!! I TOLD YOU IT WASN'T GONORRHEA!!!"

Irish hero: *kills Black and Tan* "OOOOHHHHH, gabh mo leithscéal".
Bystander: "Don't excuse yourself, he was just a fucking Black and Tan. Let's bury him under a tree and piss on the tree and knock it down for some reason".

by Definitely not Joe anyway! January 16, 2008