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Don't Ask 

A thought which often escapes idiots staring at a stranger struggling to walk. "What happened to you?" they say, before launching into the saga of their torn knee ligament, oblivious to the possibility that their prey has been disabled for decades and doesn't wish to answer appallingly inappropriate questions, nor needs your brilliant advice.
Don't ask, she thought. Don't fucking ask.
Don't Ask by Monkey's Dad April 16, 2023

don't ask me the color of anything 

Similar to the “sorry, mommy,” trend, people will usually say, “don't ask me the color of anything” after they've spotted a crush. The joke is that their infatuation prevented them from registering what was going on otherwise, like the colors in their surroundings.
Under an instagram post:
Don't ask me the color of anything.

Don't ask, Don't tell 

A phrase often used when you've done something wrong or something that can land you in deep trouble.
Example 1-
Billy: Hey, did you tell your mom about sneaking out and banging Jessica last night?

Bob- Nahh. I live by the Don't ask, Don't tell rule!

Example 2-
Guy 1: What's your dad gonna do once he finds out you totally flunked the test?

Guy 2: Don't ask, Don't tell.

Don't Ask, Just Smell

A phrase to define the new policy of not "outing" someone by asking, "Did you just fart?" Not asking someone or a roomful of people, who farted is politically correct. The person who ripped it, dealt it, or pushed it, may have a medical issue the casuses he/she to expell rancid gas at semi-regular intervals. Moreover the guilty party may be very shy and "outing" them might cause mental trauma that would far exceed the mental and physical anguish of "just smelling".
I was at a meeting the other day when Bob let out an SBDF. I thought I was going to die. I was just about to "out" him on it, but then I thought, "What about Bob's feelings?". He's been having a rough time at home and with his Irratable Bowel Syndrome, I thought it prudent to practice "Don't Ask, Just Smell".

Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to 

It’s usually the answer you don’t want to know.

Another form of Tom Krause’s quote
“never ask questions you don’t want to know the answers to” but more suited for using in conversation.

Often used by cheating girlfriends and wives after hoeing around.
Mark: Hey babe, where were you last night?
Susan: Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to

Mark: Sucked off your ex, didn’t you?

don't ask don't tell 

A stupid policy that forces the discharge of gays and lesbians from the military.
I guess this means that all men aren't created equal.

Why is the government so friggin' stupid?
More from Urban Dictionary

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
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