Carved Blumkin- a.e.: "Carvin' up a Blumkin!", esp.
prison lexicon- a festive sex act perpetrated upon new inmates upon their being processed into central lock up and the main
prison population in
American Prisons- usually occasioned on but not exclusive to
Halloween. Turning a new inmate into a "carved blumkin" usually involves his person being purchased as a "
wife" (read: "bitch"), in exchange for cigarettes or other such bartered items- as opposed to his merely remaining another bartered item himself (read "everybody's fuck). The act of "carving a blumkin" is therefore both a marital and Hallows
Eve ceremonial process of incarceration. The celebration begins with general crotch grabbing by the guests, bachelor, and best men. This is followed immediately by smuggled spoons percussed against the bars, (a clever substitution for wedding bells), calling all to the the altar (read: commode) for the fraternal ritual defecation- followed thereupon with more spoons beating upon the bars, prompting the bachelor to carry his unsuspecting object of adoration directly to his bunk in an act of non consensual conjugal sex (read
rape), as a rite of dysfunctional sexual passage... in more ways than one (read: anally). The beating of spoons on bars during the "carving of the blumkin" is the origin for many of our traditions on the
outside, such as ringing spoons upon glasses to make the bride and groom
kiss upon command.
Carved Blumkin- a.e.: "Carvin' up a Blumkin!", esp. prison lexicon - "Ohhh, hell yeah, check out tha' new 'fish'! Awwww! Is gom be one helluva
Happy mutha freakin' all Hollowed Out eve full o' sweet new meat all up in hea! Woop woop! Soon as I pinch off dis heah loaf, I gon carve me up a
piece o'dat
fine assed Blumkin o' his with dis hea niggaz Holloweeny!!!"
