1.you need braces
2. the orthodontist puts tiny bits of rubber between your teeth, after taking molds and scans that are something like the intro level of Halo 1
3. your teeth feel fine when you leave and you start to think that this might not be so bad, tsometime later (usually around dinner, which is something that is really good) your mollars hurt like bitchez, any pressure on them makes you keel over in agony.
4. at this point you finally realize the power of this man, he can hurt you more than you know, when you go back he pulls out the rubber bits and proceeds to ATTACH METAL RINGS TO THE TEETH THAT STILL FUCKING HURT after that trauma is over he moves on to a number of small, shiny things on a paper...
5. the shiny things or "brackets" get attached with glue, then a wire gets attached to the brackets
6. in a month, after more pain, the wire gets replaced with a bigger wire that hurts more.
7. this cycle continues until your teeth are straight, then they get twisted off and you STILL HAVE TO WEAR A FUCKING WIRE THING OVER YOUR TEETH

The only good thing about the entire situation is that most of the assistants to the orthodontist are hot and stupid, when they are doing the bitch work like binding brackets they often rub their boobs on you, mostly your (face) head. they giggle and look all cute and you feel the inevitable boner, and thats why she stabs you in the gums for the next appointment.
Dude 1: hey dude i just got back from the orthodontist
Dude 2: how was that?
Dude 1: not bad, the assistant rubbed her boobs in my face, which was sweet until she had to crank really hard on my Braces and they both bounced and landed on my face, well... lets just say prejac sucks...
Dude 2: wow
by hotdickingsallaround October 25, 2009
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Hitler's last Vengance weapon, codenamed Kindzahnfolterung or Child Teeth Torture. He sent Himmler, Head of the SS to an underground lab to design them. Then plans were shipped to America where spies got them patented. Hitler also designed pallet expanders and another, much worse device... Thankfully, American Troops stopped the production of this last torture....
Hitler: Ach! Himmler! Ve need to make a vengance veapon to kill ze children of ze Worlt. Or At Least hurt them...
Himmler: Brillant Mein Fuhere! We will call them braces!
by Bracecase January 13, 2007
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Medieval Torture Devices that prevent you from both eating properly and speaking.
We gave him braces for 2 years. That should teach him not to steal.
by matchewg March 20, 2006
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A dental applicance worn for 2 - 6 years glued onto your teeth by an orthodontist. Usually associated with more annoying or painful appliances, such as elastics, retainers, etc. You can't eat your favorite foods, they cut your mouth after a while, and hurt when tightened. They are overpriced, and the only advantage is that your teeth are straighter... Until you stop wearing the retainer they give you, which makes you have not straight teeth anymore >:(
Me: Yay I get my braces off today!
Orthodontist: Okay, now you have to wear this retainer all day
Me: God dammit

by FormerWearerOfBraces January 22, 2009
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Devices of hell used by orthodontists claiming they will make you look "beautiful"
Friend 1:Hey I'm getting braces!
Friend 2:Oh Lord Help Us!
Friend 1: Wha...
by ninjaskwarrior November 16, 2005
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Common identifier on female indicating that she is not legal to have sex with.
Common identifier on male indicating high probability he will not be fucking anyone.
Generally a serious cockblocker.

Nerdy form of fronts or grills.
Defendant: I didn't know she was 16.
Judge: She had on braces for fuck sake.
Defendant: Did you just curse? Does that mean it's a mistrial?
Judge: Fuck no. Your ass is still going to jail.

Teen1: I just got braces.
Teen2: You a gansta now?
Teen1: (Sad Face)No....this means I'm not getting pussy.
by Feckel Matters October 16, 2007
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