A
kinky alien race in the Star Wars expanded universe who are into S/M and bondage. They have a type of weapon called an amphistaff which goes from a limp
whip-like shape to a hardened staff shape, and hence are similar to human males. They are also into emo
cutting.
They use biotech exclusively, and no regular tech. This means for example, that their doorways are actually the
anus and sphincter of some giant animal, and the
ship has to open its sphincter to let them off. They enjoy the erotic contractions provided by living armour and clothes. Instead of lubricant they use something called Blorash Jelly.
They worship Jaina Solo, presumably because of her hot ass.
They are able to improve themselves by cutting off parts of their body and replacing them with alien limbs. For example, a Yuuzhan Vong with a tiny dick would castrate himself and implant an elephant trunk or a live
snake down there. If it didn't take hold and dropped off, he would be a shamed
one. Surprisingly, he would not be shamed by walking round with an elephant trunk hanging out his pants.
The novel Dark Journey features a very erotic sequence involving Yuuzhan Vong Warmaster Tsavong Lah and a female assistant, who he was meant to
kill because she interrupted him while he was naked and saw his massive tattooed cock, but he didn't because he had a huge erection for her. Since the Yuuzhan Vong glorify
pain and death,
sex among them is doubtless extremely interesting to observe.
Major Yuuzhan Vong ships are controlled by tentacle rape monsters called Yammosks which coordinate the entire fleet through tentacles stuck up the anuses of the other living ships.
Tsup, the Yuuzhan Vong word for a sex slave, is introduced in Edge of Victory: Rebirth as an insult used by a shaper master.
Vong web chat would look something like this (except they'd be doing it over villips or something):
Tsulah_Kang1: 0mg u r an infidel
n00b i spit on ur shoes u
meat-
maggot eating on the remains of a shamed
one
Vorhuul_Rah: STFU or GTFO u r not worthy u plead for mercy, yun yuuzhan frownz upon j00 rolfmao!1111
Tsulah_Kang1: ur
mom was an infidel robotscrewer and u r not worthy 2b in my presence u GTFO
Vorhuul_Rah: Silence or i cum over der and stick my amphistaff in ur jeedai-fucking ass
Uses in everyday conversation:
1. Shut your fucking
face, you Yuuzhan-Vong-
fucker! You fucked a Yuuzhan Vong in the ass.
2. Why are you jamming that cucumber up your
cunt? Are you a Yuuzhan Vong or something?
3. How dare you infidels besmirch the honour of Domain Novartis! Prepare to die!
