Urbanized Hillbilly
An old dude who grew up out in hillbilly land but moved to an urban area when they were a young man. They are an odd mixture of both liberal and conservative. They no longer fit in at their former home but they also don't fit in too well in the city even though they have many friends there.
Urbanized Hillbillies tend to read a lot and like to fix things like cars or anything else that needs fixing. A U.H. is the guy you call on when you need something fixed and you don't have the money to call a repairman, go to a garage, or etc.
Urbanized Hillbillies tend to read a lot and like to fix things like cars or anything else that needs fixing. A U.H. is the guy you call on when you need something fixed and you don't have the money to call a repairman, go to a garage, or etc.
City Boy 1; "Dude these snow chains I put on my tires ain't doing shit in this snow."" I'm gonna take em back then I'm gonna sue the store that sold them, and the company that made them."
City Boy 2: "Let's stop by Bob's house." " Bob's OK but his dad is a urbanized hillbilly."
City Boy 1; " No,he's a dumb motherfucker,"
City Boy 2; " "Yes he's a dumb fuck but there IS a few things those retarded hillbilly's do know." "Heres his house pull in."
Urbanized Hillbilly; "Looks at the car and shakes his head sadly and says; " First off I really would not be driving a classic car in this weather." Secondly; This is a 1969 Mustang and you put the chains on the front tires." " This is a rear wheel drive car, the chains go on the back tires." " Next time y'all do any work on a car go get a Haynes or a Chilton book and read it before you do anything else."
He then gets out his tools and proceeds to to change the chains for them.
Both city boys start jabbing each other in the ribs and whispering to each other "Look at that dumb motherfucker,he's changing it for us."
Old hillbilly thinks to himself: "Dumb fuckers." "They think I"m too stupid to know they are making fun of me." " Too stupid to know that the only reason I am doing this is because I don't want them to screw up this classic car."
City Boy 2: "Let's stop by Bob's house." " Bob's OK but his dad is a urbanized hillbilly."
City Boy 1; " No,he's a dumb motherfucker,"
City Boy 2; " "Yes he's a dumb fuck but there IS a few things those retarded hillbilly's do know." "Heres his house pull in."
Urbanized Hillbilly; "Looks at the car and shakes his head sadly and says; " First off I really would not be driving a classic car in this weather." Secondly; This is a 1969 Mustang and you put the chains on the front tires." " This is a rear wheel drive car, the chains go on the back tires." " Next time y'all do any work on a car go get a Haynes or a Chilton book and read it before you do anything else."
He then gets out his tools and proceeds to to change the chains for them.
Both city boys start jabbing each other in the ribs and whispering to each other "Look at that dumb motherfucker,he's changing it for us."
Old hillbilly thinks to himself: "Dumb fuckers." "They think I"m too stupid to know they are making fun of me." " Too stupid to know that the only reason I am doing this is because I don't want them to screw up this classic car."
Urbanized Hillbilly by OneWhoKnowsBetter December 25, 2012
