Tool Smoocher Share definition Flag One who sucks dick with aplomb. Generally reserved for men who are behaving like bitches. Man....if that guy climbs any farther up the bosses ass he's gonna get lost, He's such a fuckin tool smoocher. Tool Smoocher by rooster14 August 19, 2008 0 0 Get merch Get the Tool Smoocher mug. Buy Now — $32.95 See more merch