Snowbird season
A dreadful, blashemous season that starts around October and ends around April where elderly folk from northern states (which are known as snowbirds) come down to Florida, Arizona, Texas, anywhere with warm winters- usually it's Florida and Arizona that takes this godforsaken heat- because they hate the cold even though most have lived with it through all their 65+ years of age.
A dangerous, frightening season where the chances of causing a car accident increases tenfold. Snowbirds can easily spotted by their huge bulky polluting vehicles with blindspots as their friends going 40 on a 75mph highway in the middle of the dividing line in a lane. The causes of crashing are due to poor sight, terrible sense of location, and/or Alsheimers taking it's toll.
An annoying, erritating season where snowbirds flock to cheap diners like Denny's and Ihop 24/7- complaining about the food- and to grocery stores to buy only 2-5 pounds of food- complaing about the coupons, making sure that buying food anywhere will be a living HELL. Snowbirds are the worst neighbors that could ever exist. These "people" contantly call the police over the slightest distrubance (young folk and lamily loitering at a driveway, band practice in garage even WITH the door firmly closed, you name it); it's a proven fact. A FBI-wanted serial killer makes a better neighbor than these pests.
The only way to isolate yourself from this six month long, day-and-night nightmare is three things:
college
spring break
marde grau
A dangerous, frightening season where the chances of causing a car accident increases tenfold. Snowbirds can easily spotted by their huge bulky polluting vehicles with blindspots as their friends going 40 on a 75mph highway in the middle of the dividing line in a lane. The causes of crashing are due to poor sight, terrible sense of location, and/or Alsheimers taking it's toll.
An annoying, erritating season where snowbirds flock to cheap diners like Denny's and Ihop 24/7- complaining about the food- and to grocery stores to buy only 2-5 pounds of food- complaing about the coupons, making sure that buying food anywhere will be a living HELL. Snowbirds are the worst neighbors that could ever exist. These "people" contantly call the police over the slightest distrubance (young folk and lamily loitering at a driveway, band practice in garage even WITH the door firmly closed, you name it); it's a proven fact. A FBI-wanted serial killer makes a better neighbor than these pests.
The only way to isolate yourself from this six month long, day-and-night nightmare is three things:
college
spring break
marde grau
~ Oh SHIT! Snowbird season is here! Quick! Grab a shotgun, beer, and a bunch of partiers! WE GONNA BE BUSY THIS WINTER!
But seriously, when I'm 70 years old in the year 2053, I'm fucking moving to somewhere between Washington and Maine and deal with the winter there. I don't what to be mistaken as and treated like one of these vermin.
But seriously, when I'm 70 years old in the year 2053, I'm fucking moving to somewhere between Washington and Maine and deal with the winter there. I don't what to be mistaken as and treated like one of these vermin.
Snowbird season by Fustrated Floridian July 6, 2007
Get the Snowbird season mug.