Shark week is that one week of the month when my entire body rages against me and decides to attempt yet another mutiny. Ain't no mutiny like a shark week mutiny!
My breasts ache. My ovaries feel as if a tiny angry
troll is squeezing them. I’m bloated like a dead fish and as if by some cruel joke, it’s the one week of the entire month that my
husband finds me completely sexually irresistible.
Unfortunately for him, I am like a hybrid between a Praying Mantis and Black Widow
spider. All I want to do is rip his head off and
eat my young, not necessarily in that order.Pretty much, if you breathe you are in danger of incurring my bloody, hormonal
rage and for some reason, I swear my teeth get bigger.