Pinto Time

A powerful, rarely understood time zone where schedules are merely suggestions and arrival times are guided by vibes, snacks, and destiny.

It’s the art of arriving late with absolute confidence because:
“I get there when I get there.”
“The party doesn’t start till I get there.”
“The most important people come last.”

Living on Pinto Time means never rushing, never stressing, and somehow still making an entrance like the credits just rolled and the main character finally appeared.

Warning:

Pinto Time may cause heroic entrances, confused hosts, and people texting “Where are you???” followed by “nvm you just walked in.”

“We told him the cookout started at 2. He showed up at 3:11 with a chair and sunglasses. Pure Pinto Time.”

“The movie began at 7 but she walked in at 7:22 with popcorn like she produced the film. She must be on Pinto Time”

“Everyone was awkwardly mingling until he arrived on Pinto Time and suddenly the music got louder.”

“He didn’t miss the meeting—he made a dramatic third-act entrance on Pinto Time.”

“If you want him to be on time, tell them it starts 30 minutes earlier. Otherwise he’ll be on Pinto Time”

Pinto Time by Anthnyajp February 11, 2026

Ten Pint Time Machine 

The Ten Pint Time Machine is an amazing yet little understood phenomenon which enables men in their later years in pubs to appear attractive to the younger ladies. In some cases, especially at weddings, it also enables them to dance like famous film stars which makes them look incredibly sexy and impressive to any of the younger ladies present, especially the bridesmaids. To achieve this remarkable effect all they need to do is merely drink at least ten pints of beer. Less if they are a lightweight.

Oh dear, old Dave was fully on board the Ten Pint Time Machine the other night at the pub. Trying to chat up that barmaid and impress her with his dancing until he got his feet tangled up and fell flat on his face!

Ten Pint Time Machine by Jollyer February 26, 2023