# Newtons Laws

NEWTONS LAWS
1.) Law of inertia
2.) A=F/M
3.) Action/Reaction
4.) MAGIC (1/2MW/PD) M=magic W=wand PD=Pixie Dust
5.) FMK!!
6.) Buckets
7.) Galactical Theorum
8.) Nintendo will NEVER get laid by a living human female
9.) Human flight is impossible but you can come DAMN close via MAD hops
10.) Look at them lips
11.) You do not talk about newton's laws
12.) If its your first nite in physics class you have to fight

-Endorsed by:
Brent "Flash" Morrison
see: morrison's pimp shack
Student A- I dont understand Newton's laws of physics
Student B- Consult Newtons laws
Student A- WOW...
by Chris lambie April 11, 2006
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## Newton's 69th Law

A scientific law formulated by Sir Isaac Newton telling the likelyhood of a female having sexual relations with a male, as expressed in the equation:

100{2*lM(d^2)l/(v-S)}/G

where:
M= Muscle definition
d= douchebagness
v= Moral Values
S= slut value
G=Girl's hotness
Jon: Do you think Ashley will fuck Michael tonight?
Matt: No, he's not enough of a douchebag, so it does not satisfy Newton's 69th Law.
by ChemistryCalvin April 24, 2010
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## Newton's Turd Law

Newton's Turd Law is a physical law described by Isaac Newton, a 16th-century British physicist and mathematician, dedicated to describing the kinetic behavior of a semi-rigid externally unconstrained fecal system of particles forming a semi-rigid body, otherwise known as a Turd. Specifically, this law focuses on the behavior of a Turd post-freefall collision.

This law is part of a set, known colloquially as Newton's Laws, collectively discovered by Newton when observing that his Turds accelerated downwards and not sideways or diagonal.

This law states that 'for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction'.

Newton's Turd Law is the explanation for water splashback when taking a shit, why larger shits have appropriately larger splashbacks, and why gigantic shits could break the toilet.
We are looking forward to hosting the prestigious international physics-chemistry conference in which participants will have the opportunity to present experimental data and physical samples involving Newton's Turd Law.

If you poop in my bedroom, I will be forced by the physical law of nature known as Newton's Turd Law to defecate in your bedroom, equally by total quantity in volume, assuming a similar density of substance.
by SecGen-TopBoff-SIHCEL November 13, 2021
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## Newton's 60th Law

After you finish your placements in Overwatch, you shall lose 7 matches in a row no matter what happens.
We must stop doing our placement matches, otherwise Newton's 60th Law will fuck us over.
by keppycs March 12, 2021
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## Newton's 4th Law

"For every reaction, there is a female overreaction"

Newton's 4th Law is the least known of all, but perhaps his most accurate one.
- Hey Joey heard you got in a fight with your girl.
- What can I say, man, Newton's 4th Law made its effect.
by MCDrugzzz March 25, 2016
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## Newton's Third Law

Laying on your non-dominant side's hip, proceed to lube your entire hand. Next, shove entire right hand inside your anus. It is best to feel around a bit before proceeding to your left hand. Your left hand will firmly grasp your phallic member and fondle your throbbing shaft. With both of your hands in motion the force applied thus shall be performing Newton's Third Law.
Mr. Schachter: How was your night? You were screaming quite loud.

Reginald: 'Twas grand. I performed the Newton's Third Law and used an entire bottle of kY.
by One-Pump-Shotgun March 7, 2017
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## Newton's second law

In physics, Newton's second law of motion is a relationship between the acceleration of an object and the forces that act on it. The law states that the sum of the forces applied to an object in an inertial frame of reference is the product of its acceleration by its mass.
Her: "Come over"
Me: "I can't, I'm learning physics"
Her: "My parents aren't home"
Me: *applies a constant force on my own body directed towards hers, causing myself to accelerate in her direction according to Newton's second law applied to my body of constant mass in the terrestrial frame of reference, which can be considered as inertial*
by girl in image April 18, 2021
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