Kankakrappy 

To describe a northeast Illinois city named Kankakee which has a disproportionate number of boarded rental units to active single-family homes, numerous run-down neighborhoods, kids on the corners begging for money, and "adults" who don't pay their bills, but continue to soak the government for public aid so they can buy electronics and drugs. A very poor town unmotivated to clean its image. A town many people leave only to find that the world is not such a bad and ugly place.

Kankakrappy is a city unlike any other. No one actually desires to live there. Citizens from surrounding towns are embarrassed to say they're near there. The people who bear the misfortune of being born in Kankakrappy somehow wind up stuck in the town like the way dog shit sticks to your shoes long after you think you've finally got them clean. Outsiders are never welcome, and will be forced out either through crime, drugs, prostitution, theft, or just plain suffocation from a hefty saturation of stupid-juice poured out by the town as a whole.

Victor: I live in Orlando, where are you from?

Denise: I'm from Kankakrappy.

Victor: Oh man!!! WTF?!??!? I've heard of that place. Wasn't it ranked the worst place to live in America a while back?

Denise: Yep. And everyday it just keeps getting better. My cousin still lives there. She's hooked on weed, and just bought a new IPOD. She hasn't paid her rent or her utility bills in 3 months, and now she might have to move because she's got fleas. She blames her landlord. She said she's going to have one of her sons piss in every corner of her place before she leaves, though. She's a real piece of shit.

Vic: Sounds like they should just evacuate the town, tear it down and start over . . .

Kankakrappy by Tommy Nevis Crandall Jones January 19, 2008