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FSB Technique

The Finger-Spoon Breakup technique is a last resort breakup technique that will leave no doubt to the state of any relationship (or sudden lack there of) due to its unique approach to guilt manipulation.
The effect is that upon waking, a girl will find that she is spooning her boyfriend with one finger in his anus; as he awakes at the same moment, his shock and disgust will leave no other option but to end said relationship.
To implement the FSB technique: When the female partner is asleep, one puts ones head atop her lower arm, rotates into the small spoon position and pulls her into big spoon position. The next step is to (quite impressively) insert her finger into ones anus without rousing her from her slumber.
Upon waking, give the poor girl a moment to realise what "she has done" and then awake with apparent shock and display clear signs of feelings of abuse and mistrust. Explain the situation using emotional angles and lay on the guilt nice and heavy. The rest should come naturally
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