Emergency Bat 

When presented with a particularly stressful situation in life, a male may choose to partake in an emergency bat to relieve stress and help cope with the situation.

For example, after several hours of attempting to pick up at Arcadia Hotel with no success, a male can head to the bathroom and have an emergency bat to relieve the stress induced by the inability to find a partner in which to fornicate with.

If he so chooses, the batsmen can perform the emergency bat right there on the spot. (NB: This practice is generally frowned upon and may result in an earlier than anticipated eviction from the designated strike out venue)

The emergency bat is not reserved only for occasions of strike out, it can be used in a multitude of situations. For example if an exam is more difficult than anticipated (perhaps a lack of study because of too much porn during swot vac), a male can head to the bathrooms and relieve some stress. Or if you are DJing at a venue and the crowd you are playing to is very indie and they do not take kindly to your Zoë Badwi remix that you spent hours preparing. A quick trip to the bathroom for an emergency bat mid set may sufficiently relieve the tension and give you the resolve to soldier on.

Guy 1: Just got rejected for the third time tonight, cannot take a trick at the moment.

Darryl: Shit mate. Maybe have an emergency bat or something and try again later?? Or you could switch to guys and just give up all together.

Guy 1: Fuck you darryl. But yes I will have an emergency bat.

Emergency Bat by knackerbags May 29, 2011

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