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Dread shred 

The moment when a dreadlocked personage realises that they have a dread trapped in the office shredder.

Usually accompanied by a scream for assistance, the dread shred victim can only hope that the shredder becomes clogged or full before the dread is wrenched out at the root, or worse, their entire head begins to be grinded to pulp.

The victim of a dread shred should clearly realise that there is only suffering ahead before the situation gets any better.
"Frank, come quick you lummox! Jade's having a dread shred!"

"Whoa, turn it off at the plug!"

Dead Shredder

1. When a guy puts his hand on his Penis and his partner or whomever moves his arm, thus stroking his man meat with his hand.

2. To give someone a handjob with their own hand.
Jason Mewes demonstrated the Dead Shredder to Seth Rogen at the end of Zack and Miri Make A Porno.
Dead Shredder by DJ Dingus January 16, 2010

building a shed over a dead tool 

"Since I saw you last, I see you have been building a shed over a dead tool"