Skip to main content

Dracoturtles

Vicious imaginary beasts, 2 meter high (about 6 feet) and 5 meters long (not including the tail) fire-breathing turtles, with a long spiked dragon tail which they uses to whip and pierce their victims with. Another one of their evolutionary gifts are very powerful triangular jaws, that end with a point, with which great pressure could be applied on a single point of something unfortunate enough to be caught in between them.

Dracoturtles existed up to the middle ages, secluded in caves, usually near volcanos, everflowing rivers of lava, or other hot places. When knights came to slay them, they used their immensely powerful jaws like a can opener, to open the armour of the knight.

At winter when there were less knights,
they had to resort to kidnapping princesses so valiant knights would come and rescue them.

With the passing of the middle ages and the introduction of gunpowder to the world, they were extinct, together with their more deadly brothers - the dragons.

Turtles, however, were not considered dangerous by the humans and so were not slain... But they are... and one day... expect the turtles to exact revenge upon the foolish humans who killed their brothers.

The imaginary beasts are used in no book, in no movie, by no person... but they should.

Also see: Shlomo the Camel
Examples of not-so-famous Dracoturtles: Randolf the Mighty, Squary the Square-jawed...
Dracoturtles by Yaly Sela August 30, 2005
Related Words

Serial Monogamist 

Someone who jumps from one relationship immediately into another one.

Serial monogamists can not stand to be alone and often suffer from vast commitment and insecurity issues.

Because they jump into relationships immediately after the previous one has ended, serial monogamists typically don't take the time to reflect on their behavior or why their previous relationships failed; thus, they end up making the same relationship mistakes over and over again.
Person 1: Damn, Dustin already has a new girlfriend?! It's only been two weeks since he broke up with his fiance! I think he's a sociopath.

Person 2: No, he's a serial monogamist...
Word of the Day on June 22, 2026

liquid lunch 

A lunchbreak comprised entirely of alcoholic beverages, and no food.
"With all the lay-offs that morning, it was rough. I hit the bar around the corner for a liquid lunch mid-day."
liquid lunch by Alexandra July 27, 2004
Word of the Day on June 21, 2026
Dunzo, a slang word for done/finshed. Made famous by the Laguna Beach cast.
This car is so dunzo. (Kristin's car breaks down.)
dunzo by Joey Pellet December 8, 2004
Word of the Day on June 20, 2026

ankle biter

Someone or something that bites your ankles.
To a postman, an ankle biter is often known as a dog.
To an adult, an ankle biter may be a toddler.
To hikers, an ankle biter is sometimes a tick.
And so on.
"Dang ankle biter took off my whole leg!!"
ankle biter by the sane maniac February 2, 2004
Word of the Day on June 19, 2026

Male Pattern Blindness 

When a man will search for hours to find something that is laying out in the open on a table. Items are often easily found by a women.
Man: "I have been searching for hours for keys."
Woman: "You mean the ones sitting there on the coffee table?"
Man: "Where?"
Woman: "Right there in the middle of that table."
Man: "oh, must have been Male Pattern Blindness"
Male Pattern Blindness by diablo581 February 10, 2008
Word of the Day on June 18, 2026