when i fucked that virgin last night with my mile-long schlong, it was like trying to fit a cadillac in a doghouse.
by Mr. B0jangles. March 24, 2014
When a guy is in the proverbial "doghouse" with his woman and knows his chances of getting sex is low, which makes him want sex more since he can't have it. Constant hard-ons are the result.
by Jessykaw March 26, 2017
When a lonely elderly person moans for the sake of moaning because they have given up on life and are scared of what lays ahead in the future. They tend not to deal well with things moving forward or advances in modern life. They also harp on about things that happened in the fifties. 99.9% of what they say tends to be mind numbingly boring and not interesting.
by Sheilagoesoutwithhermatestella July 28, 2017
From observation, recognising that the general standard of television in my opinion has deteriorated and continues to do so year by year, so much so I now watch very little, I’ve found as far as the programme quality and content on all television channels, the following Doghouse's Laws of Television often apply.
I started compiling this list several years ago and some of these "laws" are now occasionally mentioned by contributors to a specific TV network message board, though of course they can apply to any channel.
I'm sure other contributors may relate to some of them and can think of other examples of practices which could be added to the list.
With a new programme, if your impression of it after ten minutes is that it's going to be rubbish, you’ll only be right 95% of the time.
The number of advance programme trails screened, will be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme. The ”best bits” of any programme will be included in the trail.
The volume of background music will often be in inverse proportion to the amount of watchable activity on the screen at that time.
Any TV audience gets the standard of programmes it deserves. It’s no good complaining about the quality of a programme if you continue to watch it.
If an idea for a programme suggested to a TV network commissioning department isn’t another soap in one form or another, or requires an "in your face" presenter/auto-cutie, celebrities, judges, phone votes, or the inclusion of dysfunctional members of the public, it is unlikely to be made.
The number of programme presenters appearing at any one time, will usually be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme.
The number and variety of similar programmes on TV, are likely to be in inverse proportion to their cost to present.
To reach the widest audience, in a programme where the subject is of a specific nature, it may include totally unrelated elements in an attempt to also “engage” viewers who aren’t the slightest bit interested in the actual topic, in a futile attempt to increase the ratings.
Some programmes, even a few news bulletins, given the level at which the programme makers pitch their production, should have the words; "for Dummies" added to the title.
If you've any doubts about watching a programme, from the trails or advertising you've seen, take a chance, give it a miss.
I started compiling this list several years ago and some of these "laws" are now occasionally mentioned by contributors to a specific TV network message board, though of course they can apply to any channel.
I'm sure other contributors may relate to some of them and can think of other examples of practices which could be added to the list.
With a new programme, if your impression of it after ten minutes is that it's going to be rubbish, you’ll only be right 95% of the time.
The number of advance programme trails screened, will be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme. The ”best bits” of any programme will be included in the trail.
The volume of background music will often be in inverse proportion to the amount of watchable activity on the screen at that time.
Any TV audience gets the standard of programmes it deserves. It’s no good complaining about the quality of a programme if you continue to watch it.
If an idea for a programme suggested to a TV network commissioning department isn’t another soap in one form or another, or requires an "in your face" presenter/auto-cutie, celebrities, judges, phone votes, or the inclusion of dysfunctional members of the public, it is unlikely to be made.
The number of programme presenters appearing at any one time, will usually be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme.
The number and variety of similar programmes on TV, are likely to be in inverse proportion to their cost to present.
To reach the widest audience, in a programme where the subject is of a specific nature, it may include totally unrelated elements in an attempt to also “engage” viewers who aren’t the slightest bit interested in the actual topic, in a futile attempt to increase the ratings.
Some programmes, even a few news bulletins, given the level at which the programme makers pitch their production, should have the words; "for Dummies" added to the title.
If you've any doubts about watching a programme, from the trails or advertising you've seen, take a chance, give it a miss.
by Doghouse Riley September 19, 2008
The Act of a man freezing a Turd then placing it inside the womans mouth before having sex with her.
During sex the turd heats up having a sloppy consistancy a lot like a wet dog. The womans mouth being the doghouse.
During sex the turd heats up having a sloppy consistancy a lot like a wet dog. The womans mouth being the doghouse.
Bro ive got a dog freezing in the freezer and its begging for a home. Shes gonna get a mean Alaskan Doghouse
by Mike lawry December 30, 2009
Doghousing: Inserting your penis into your partners vagina and going to sleep. No pushing involved, just a warm place for your dog to spend the night.
by DoghossinSOB January 14, 2017
When a couple of guys working on a project are away from their wives for too long, and they end up in the doghouse.
by tnfly November 2, 2017