One's inability to achieve an erection after a full day of scuba diving.
Oh baby, I would love to give you a good rogering, but after our amazing day out on the reef, I'm afraid I'm suffering from a bad case of diverdickulitis.
When your colon is soooo full from all the holiday food and drinking that your colonic pockets fill up and get infected so bad that you have to go to the hospital
Diverticulitis Christmas: As in “damn that turkey, gravy, stuffing, cheese puffs, red wine, cranberry sauce, trifle, and Christmas cookies were so good that I plugged myself up and got diverticulitis.”
when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.
This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.
FRIEND A: "Did you just take a stealthie of me?"
FRIEND B (turning phone around): "no I was just using snapchat's new filter, see?"