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Bed Intruder

Someone who climbs in windows, snatches people up and tries to rape them. It is preferred to hide your kids, your wife and husband when you meet said bed intruder.
Steven: did you see that bed intruder on the news today?

Chad: Yeah. He left his t-shirt and fingerprints and all.

Steven: they are really dumb.

Chad: for real.
by Leviathong November 28, 2021
mugGet the Bed Intrudermug.

Fuck bed

Fuck Bed
When staying in hotel room with 2 beds ONE is designated for fucking and one is dedicated for sleeping. This is for the purpose of keeping all of your sex juices in one place and having a clean place to sleep afterward.
Oh no no!! Don’t sit there, that’s the fuck bed...it’s covered in hot wet spots!!!”
by PixieGirl1973 March 21, 2019
mugGet the Fuck bedmug.

Bed Bugs

Apparently, if you run you air conditioning 24/7 it's hard to tell whether or not you have bed bugs but now that they shut my electricity off.... I have bed bugs.
Hym "You want to know what a better use of my time would constitute me sitting in a powerless house scratching the bites I wake up with every morning because, apparently, I have bed bugs.... There is literally nothing I can do about any of this. How's Todd doing? Is he sitting in the dark, scratching he bed bug bites? No? Alright. Cool."

Dr. jeepjorp "It's your own fault"

Hym "Did I rob myself? Did I increase the cost of everything by 150%? Ooh right. I fail to report the fact that the caregivers at the group home I worked at were fucking the retard and violated the abuse and neglect policy which it the direct cause of me getting fired. It's a good thing everyone I know isn't covering for the retard and the whore or this would be someone else's fault...."
by Hym Iam September 10, 2022
mugGet the Bed Bugsmug.

Bed Brownie

An unfortunate or surprise bowel movement that someone finds upon waking, usually after a hard night of drinking or experimentation with laxatives and/or bad mexican food.
Dude. After eating at Paco's last night, my stomach felt a little funny. And when I woke up this morning, I found a bed brownie!
by CarolineInTheATL June 21, 2010
mugGet the Bed Browniemug.

bed budge

The nudging or budging of erogenous zones while in a reclined position instigating an erotic or sexual moment.
"After hooking up with Megan we fell asleep and the next morning I woke up with a hard on so I bed budged her while we spooned and we ended up doing it again. After that we took a shower and fucked again. Awesome!"
by JelloShots Irene's Greenpoint September 7, 2013
mugGet the bed budgemug.

Bed-Lightning

The flashes of light that come from your partner's FitBit during love making.
"During sex last night, the bed-lightning coming from her FitBit was intense."
by jlwn111 November 9, 2016
mugGet the Bed-Lightningmug.

bed log

Usually a new man who sexually keeps a woman warm in bed.
Denice finally found her a new bed log
by 515thebayou February 21, 2018
mugGet the bed logmug.

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