i have cheese

means to have a wedgie

I wanted to go to Fruit Salad, but I have cheese.

Can someone tell the new girl she has cheese?

by jakiechan79 April 27, 2021

Have we met?

When a stranger text and you are trying to be nice

-Hey
+Hey, Have we met?

by Hojack Borseman October 28, 2020

Have Fun CHILDREN

When children HAVE FUN and do FUN ADULT STUFF

DARRIN:Have Fun CHILDREN
Everyone:SURE BYE I AM GONNA HAVE FUN WITH MY GF

by Ultimate bj man January 13, 2019

No-Pillow-Having-Wife

A wife who snuggles on the couch with you without bringing a pillow, and falls asleep, leaving you trapped as a headrest and you don't sleep well, but you still love her more than she loves you after you wake up sore.

My No-Pillow-Having-Wife fell asleep on me like that cute cat in those memes and I had to stay still all night so I didn't wake her up. Now I'm sore, but I still love that bitch more than anything.

by Ixidor Waveharp February 15, 2021

have-a da stupid

have-a da stupid is a phrase often said by mothers from a foreign country when their children do something dumb, idiotic or stupid.

Guido: "Aye, ma. OH! I'm in jail. OH! You gotta bail me out. OH!"
Guido's Mom: "Guido, my son. Why are you in jail?"
Guido: "OH! I pulled out my penis. OH! I ran up to a cop. OH! Then, I jumped up, and slapped him across the face with it. OH!"
Guido's Mom: "Do you have-a da stupid?"

by Brock_Lee September 4, 2022

Apples Have Epilepsy

When you mishear something hilariously wrong because you couldn't really hear the speaker.

Named for a hilarious fail from The Pun Guys doing the Whisper Challenge, where one person wears "loud-ass headphones" and has to figure out the nonsensical sentence that is being said to them.

The opposite of this is "The Thin Rhino" (Also from The Pun Guys)

Dan: Camels eat sexy paper clips.
John: ...Apples have epilepsy!

*Dan dies laughing*

(Opposite version)

John: The thin rhino ate the possessed i-pod.

*Later*
John: The thin rhino...
Dan: The thin rhino?

John: YES!

Dan: What? Wow!!

by Ubeenbamboozledson June 24, 2020

i have fat

I have fat. Something a rich white person who doesn’t want to admit they are fat says.
“Dude, you need to get on the treadmill. You’re fucking fat”

“Sweetie, you need to get on the treadmill. You’re fucking fat”
“Darling, I have fat, I am CERTAINLY NOT fat!”

by Urbandictionilisationnnn November 29, 2018