Occurs when a person(s) attempting to covertly commit a malicious act(s) against another person(s) are prematurely discovered resulting in poorly scripted justification excuses that present those actions as beneficial to the target person. There are many reasons this can happen but commonly is due to either the collectives inability to properly formulate a well thought out undetectable plan of attack, or their targets unanticipated over attention to details.
"I'm just now hearing that Bob had a drug addiction?"
"Yeah his coworkers tried to make him think it was the drugs he was using making him crazy by doing a bunch of weird stuff but he caught them doing it so it became an Intervention instead of bob actually losing his mind and winding up in the nervous hospital "
"What did he do then? "
"Bob's been in a good mood since putting down the drugs and since having cleaned out the care pie. Probably won't do anything at all if coworkers continue being good coworkers, but the statue of limitations on those actions committed lasts a long time so they'll have to keep that up for a while."
"Is bob mad about being care pied?"
"I don't think so. Like any paranoid weirdo bob learned that the dick was in his ass early and instead of fighting it he learned to enjoy it. Can't say I'd be the same way. What about that local school and/or college sports team?"
"Yeah his coworkers tried to make him think it was the drugs he was using making him crazy by doing a bunch of weird stuff but he caught them doing it so it became an Intervention instead of bob actually losing his mind and winding up in the nervous hospital "
"What did he do then? "
"Bob's been in a good mood since putting down the drugs and since having cleaned out the care pie. Probably won't do anything at all if coworkers continue being good coworkers, but the statue of limitations on those actions committed lasts a long time so they'll have to keep that up for a while."
"Is bob mad about being care pied?"
"I don't think so. Like any paranoid weirdo bob learned that the dick was in his ass early and instead of fighting it he learned to enjoy it. Can't say I'd be the same way. What about that local school and/or college sports team?"
by TheGreatestWhite February 13, 2019
by thatkid@39 November 21, 2020
by Gulag hermit April 26, 2020
The ultimate paradox wrapped in a hoodie and a messy bun. She's the epitome of 'tough chick' outside, slaying life's challenges with the grace of a ninja and the sass of a stand-up comic. But behind closed doors? Get ready for the rollercoaster ride of emotions that would make even the most seasoned therapist raise an eyebrow.
She'll go from zero to 'hangry' in 2.5 seconds flat, with mood swings that could give a hormonal teenager a run for their money. Yet, despite her occasional bouts of irrationality, she'll make your heart swell with a love so profound it's like she's invented her own brand of emotional superglue.
Sure, she'll test your patience with her stubbornness and tease you relentlessly until you're begging for mercy. But in the end, she'll wrap you in a bear hug so tight you'll forget why you were mad in the first place. She's not just your girlfriend; she's your partner-in-crime, your emotional support hotline, and your personal comedian.
And when life gets tough, she'll be your rock, your guiding light in a sea of chaos. With her by your side, you'll feel like you can conquer the world, even if it's just conquering the pile of dishes in the sink. So buckle up, because with her, every day is a wild, hilarious, and utterly unpredictable adventure. But hey, at least you'll never have a dull moment!
She'll go from zero to 'hangry' in 2.5 seconds flat, with mood swings that could give a hormonal teenager a run for their money. Yet, despite her occasional bouts of irrationality, she'll make your heart swell with a love so profound it's like she's invented her own brand of emotional superglue.
Sure, she'll test your patience with her stubbornness and tease you relentlessly until you're begging for mercy. But in the end, she'll wrap you in a bear hug so tight you'll forget why you were mad in the first place. She's not just your girlfriend; she's your partner-in-crime, your emotional support hotline, and your personal comedian.
And when life gets tough, she'll be your rock, your guiding light in a sea of chaos. With her by your side, you'll feel like you can conquer the world, even if it's just conquering the pile of dishes in the sink. So buckle up, because with her, every day is a wild, hilarious, and utterly unpredictable adventure. But hey, at least you'll never have a dull moment!
Every guy needs a caring girlfriend to keep his life from turning into a sitcom.
Nyan always says he's the 'mastermind,' but we all know it's God, his caring girlfriend, who keeps their ship afloat
Nyan always says he's the 'mastermind,' but we all know it's God, his caring girlfriend, who keeps their ship afloat
by God_is_I May 12, 2024
The ultimate blend of affection and annoyance. She's the one who will drive you up the wall with endless nagging about taking your meds and wearing a coat, but she'll also be the first to hold your hand when life gets tough. She'll roast you with the precision of a gourmet chef but loves you more than a fat kid loves cake. Expect plenty of "I told you so's" when things go sideways, but also count on her to pick you up, dust you off, and help you try again. She'll stick by you through thick and thin, with a dedication that borders on "I'd-rather-commit-a-felony-than-break-up" loyalty. A whirlwind of sarcasm, love, and unwavering support—she's your rock, your partner in crime, and your favorite pain in the ass.
When Nyan ended up on the floor, Sloth laughed her ass off and managed a "told you so" every now and then. Being a caring girlfriend, she helped him up but will most likely roast him when the opportunity provides it.
by God_is_I May 19, 2024
You should be acting in accordance with my propositional ethic regardless of what you (it's funny I actually typed "I" instead of "you" initially because I still mix up pronouns from time to time) believe! That's what I do! Act out propositions that I don't actually believe! And I don't even do that! I do whatever I feel like doing and then try to get people to accept propositions (without thinking) I don't actually believe!
Dr. JerpPeej "WHO CARES WHAT YOU BELIEVE!?"
Hym "I do. And I guess my fans. Which is why I don't like when this is trivialized. It's an insult to my fans that I cannot abide! I mean, look at you. Reading this. I'm not making you do this anymore. You clearly came here (where this is I don't even know how you're seeing this) to see what I had to say today. You might think it's brilliant and put it in your tv show and/or movie. You might ad lib it on set and send chills down the spine of your co-worker. You might use it to recruit interns. Either way, thanks for... reading? Does this count as watching? Viewing? I don't know. I'm getting off topic. How cares what I believe? Me. How are these beliefs working for me? They're not stopping me from doing anything. YOUR beliefs (on the other hand) ARE doing that..."
Hym "I do. And I guess my fans. Which is why I don't like when this is trivialized. It's an insult to my fans that I cannot abide! I mean, look at you. Reading this. I'm not making you do this anymore. You clearly came here (where this is I don't even know how you're seeing this) to see what I had to say today. You might think it's brilliant and put it in your tv show and/or movie. You might ad lib it on set and send chills down the spine of your co-worker. You might use it to recruit interns. Either way, thanks for... reading? Does this count as watching? Viewing? I don't know. I'm getting off topic. How cares what I believe? Me. How are these beliefs working for me? They're not stopping me from doing anything. YOUR beliefs (on the other hand) ARE doing that..."
by Hym Iam March 18, 2023
I Am Being Volatile Towards Baseball Helmets for Batting And I Do Not Care
I Am Being Volatile Towards Baseball Helmets for Batting And I Do Not Care
by LeSouffleDeVersailles April 24, 2025