Fidget Spinner Masterbation 

When you lube up your genitals and then take out the middle bearing of a Fidget Spinner then slide it onto your genitals and spin it until you cum.

I'm gonna go do some Fidget Spinner Masterbation..

Fidget Spinner Masterbation by Salmon_Slapper May 24, 2017

masturbating

What you were probably doing a few moments ago.

Joe: Whatcha doing?
Jimmy: Masturbating.
Joe: Cool, me too.

masturbating by Chuck Norris' son February 7, 2009

Masturbating Monkey

When a monkey in the forest or at the zoo get's a erection and grabs his penis and starts to jack off like a car piston and starts shooting sperm all over the place, then he goes "HOOO OHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HOO HO HOO!!!!" when the male monkey starts to think oh the female monkeys. and sperm starts to land on you and you child.

Child: mommy, WTF IS THAT BLACK MONKEY DOING?!?
Mom: Don't be racist!!! He's just a masturbating monkey

Doctor: hey Steve, that monkey seems to be masturbating?
Steve: I think he is, we should test his heart rate to make sure it's safe for the masturbating monkey.
Steve: ok... WHAT?! IT'S OVER 9000!!!!!!

Masturbating Monkey by theaveragejoe33 October 27, 2010

Macturbating 

Noun: The act of pleasuring oneself through the use of an Apple Product.

Steve got an iPhone5 for his birthday and has been macturbating all weekend

Macturbating by Madhav4 September 14, 2012

Mirror Masterbation 

The act of masterbating to your own reflection.

Tom: I'm so hot I'd masterbate to myself.

Bill: You what?

Tom: Ever heard of Mirror Masterbation?

Bill: No... That sounds nasty.

Mirror Masterbation by Flawless23 April 21, 2011

Fasterbating 

The art of masterbating really fast and cumming within a 2 minute range is called Fasterbating

David: Well, my mom was coming home soon, but I was majorly horny... so I started Fasterbating.

Jim Bob: And...

David: 1 minute 30 seconds

Jim Bob: Nice

Fasterbating by Chaz E. February 28, 2008

female masterbation 

The self-stimulation of female genitals. See flicking the bean

female masterbation by Big Simes January 22, 2003